Musings from Brian J. Noggle: Thank God He's Not A Country Boy

Thank God He's Not A Country Boy

Thank God He's Not A Country Boy This weekend, someone posted a bit about how Barack Obama should take note lessons from Hank William, Jr.,'s "A Country Boy Can Survive" to court the rural vote. As someone who listens to Hank Williams, Jr., for pleasure, I'd have to point out that Barack Obama could not actually adhere to the philosophy the song encompasses. Let's do a line-by-line of the lyrics, shall we?

The preacher man says it's the end of time
For starters, this line indicates going to church, and many of the Democrat leaders only appear in church around election time. Some of the most faithful Democratics I know in the urbanati are active, enthusiastic atheists. So this line and its millenial, evangelical preacher man don't conform with many Democrat candidate leanings, much less Obama's--who has preacher man problems of his own, as those who dwell amongst the blogs know.

And the Mississippi River she's a goin' dry
A good environmental millenialism. Democrats already tap into the global warming/environmental disaster meme, but so does McCain (sadly). So Obama has nothing to learn here.

The interest is up and the stock market's down
Well, this economic malaise millenialism fits a Democrat theme, but it doesn't hold terribly true according to current metrics. The interest rates are way down, and the stock market is a bit behind, but not far off. The song was originally recorded in 1981, and the economic malaise was inherited from Carter (D) with the conditions. Put that sweater on and shiver in it.

And you only get mugged
If you go downtown
Now, we have a bit of a disconnect. The fear of crime and a strong law-and-order impulse are mostly Republican weighted issues. City cores and the urban rulers and voters trend Democratic, so some suburban types (such as me) see the hellholes in cities and think they're problems caused by Democratic policies until a Giuliani cleans them up. Banging a drum too loudly about how screwed up cities are might draw attention to how they got that way.

I live back in the woods, you see
A woman and the kids, and the dogs and me
A nuclear family. Sounds good. But who is it that mocks family values? Oh, yeah, the urbanati.

I got a shotgun, rifle, and a 4-wheel drive
Guns and a fuel-consuming sport utility vehicle (with dogs and kids, I'd picture a Chevy Blazer). Any urbanati Democrat candidate that espoused these would look foolish and somewhat hypocritical. Like Obama is doing now.

And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive
I don't think this is what the urbanati care about. All they care is that the rural folks fail to outvote their urban voters, who will probably go Democrat anyway.

I can plow a field all day long
I can catch catfish from dusk till dawn
As Kerry and other urban Democrat candidates know, regaling voters with stories of harvesting grain or being lifelong hunters doesn't work, since you're likely to make a gaffe or slip into cornpone accents.

We make our own whiskey and our own smoke too
Ain't too many things these ole boys can't do

Whereas Obama might appreciate a good homemade smoke, Democrats aren't terribly interested in unregulated craft manufacturing. None of our government officials are, really; if there's a lobbying group that wants to keep upstarts out, the government leaders pass certification and licensing laws. Never mind that; what else are we talking about here? Ah, yes, smoking and drinking, the new anathemas to modern urbanati living, which must be banned in as many locations as possible. Which is "all" to some minds.

We grow good ole tomatoes and homemade wine
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive
The song is an anthem to self-reliance. Growing your own food and making your own booze? But Democrat initiatives don't expect that much of constituents. No, instead, here, have some free money and free cheese. Vote for me, and next time it's more free money and maybe some chicken. Please don't spend that money on seeds, or we'll cut your benefit.

Because you can't stomp us out
And you can't make us run
'Cause we're them old boys raised on shotgun
Resilience and tenacity. Put some bombs bursting in air, and you've got "The Star-Spangled Banner".

We say grace and we say Ma'am
And if you ain't into that we don't give a damn

This is a libertarian impulse coupled with a traditional conservative respect for others and belief in God. Unfortunately, one does not get the sense that the Democrat party platform is about not giving a damn about other people's business. Sadly, neither is the Republican party's in many places. But I doubt Obama's "Change" involves not freaking out about how tall your neighbor's lawn is or whether Georgia allows this when Connecticut does not (What! Let's pass a Federal statute to make it the same everywhere according to the prevailing busybody taste!)

We came from the West Virginia coal mines
And the Rocky Mountains and the western skies
No, the Democrat frontrunners come from the cities and other urbanati enclaves in academic environments. Saying you're authentic or that you've worked for a living won't make it so, so let's not just drop a hard hat with a carbide lamp on you for a photo op, okay?

We can skin a buck; we can run a trot line
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive
Skinning Bambi? Catching fish? Hurting Mother Gaia's more important children? Okay, I'm adding urbanati hysterics for fun here, but a lot of urbanati want to limit hunting in myriad ways. I don't know Obama's voting record on these issues, but I'd guess they're either "Present" or not against the limitations.

I had a good friend in New York City
He never called me by my name, just hillbilly
That's actually probably in line with urbanati conversation, although "redneck" has replaced hillbilly as the appellation for choice for those not fortunate enough to live amid the concrete warrens of the like-minded.

My grandpa taught me how to live off the land
And his taught him to be a businessman
He used to send me pictures of the Broadway nights
And I'd send him some homemade wine
An exchange of the "service economy" versus people who actually make stuff for a living. A photo for a product. To the urbanati, that's a good exchange. Perhaps Obama has already tapped into this, offering style instead of substance.

But he was killed by a man with a switchblade knife For 43 dollars my friend lost his life
Again, the crime in the city. The Ed Koch years. Remember the 1970s and 1980s and the New York City of that era? Yeah, to urbanati of a certain age, living there amid the crime and the crumbling gives them credibility. Unfortunately, Obama's not that old. Banging the drum of street crime won't endear him to the urban vote.

I'd love to spit some beechnut into that dude's eyes
And shoot him with my old .45
Cause a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive
What, with a handgun? Citizens cannot be trusted with handguns. Just lock yourself behind a hollow core closet door and call 911. Then your survivors can lose a lawsuit because police do not have a duty to protect any individual.

Cause you can't stomp us out, and you can't make us run
'Cause we're them old boys raised on shotgun.
We say grace, and we say Ma'am
And if you ain't into that we don't give a damn.
We're from North California and south Alabam
And little towns all around this land
And we can skin a buck; we can run a trot line
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

I don't think there's much in the song for Obama to embrace, authentically and sincerely. The Democratic Party encourages dependency, more than even the other party that encourages dependency upon its largess when in power. Strong libertarian messages coupled with a marked belief in traditional values won't sound right coming from Obama's mouth, not if he's also professing to be the fount of all change and goodness and impending utopia.

(Links courtesy of Outside the Beltway and .)

- posted by Brian J. @ 3:26 PM