Thursday, December 07, 2006
A Hipster Test
A new scientific experiment to determine the nature of hipsters:
    Apple Computer Inc. may be cool and hip with consumers, but it's anything but a trend-setter when it comes to good environmental policies, according to the activist group Greenpeace.

    In its latest report on major electronics manufacturers, Greenpeace ranked Apple dead last on environmental issues because it still uses harmful chemicals in many of its products and because it does a poor job promoting recycling efforts for its iPods and other products.
If the hipster under study receives this news and changes to HP and Zune, he or she is genuinely concerned about the environment; if the hipster under study receives this news and continues with the Macs, iPods, and contributions to Greenpeace, the hipster only cares about appearances or his or her own creature comforts, with the money going to environmental causes as a sop to his or her own conscience. Or, I suppose, the person likes Apple stuff and thinks this is a cynical ploy by Greenpeace to increase donations by conscience-stricken materialist hipsters.

Aw, heck, I guess it could mean anything. I, Mr. Noggle, am a poor scientist. But that's why I got an English degree.

Actually, it's column B. Greenpeace is lying to get publicity.

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To say Noggle, one first must be able to say the "Nah."