Friday, November 12, 2004
 
Choosy Beggars

Here's what you should put in a "perfect" Scouting for Food bag this year:
    • 2 cans of hearty soup, stew or chili supply many nutrients;
    • 2 cans of tuna, chicken, salmon or luncheon meat contain protein and iron, and canned salmon is a source of calcium and omega-3 fatty acids;
    • 1 can of fruit supplies vitamins A and C, folate, potassium, fiber and other healthy substances;
    • 1 can of 100 percent pure fruit juice contains vitamin C and often beta carotene;
    • 1 can of vegetables supplies beta carotene, vitamin C, folate, complex carbohydrates, fiber and potassium;
    • 1 can of tomato or pasta sauce contains lycopene, a healthy substance that is more available to your body in canned and cooked tomatoes than in fresh tomatoes;
    • 1 canned meal offers a variety of ingredients and nutrients;
    • 1 can of beans contains plenty of protein, complex carbohydrates and fiber; and
    • 1 can of evaporated milk makes an excellent source of calcium and protein.
Here's what you're getting out of the Noggle home again this year, same as last year:
  • Any cans of meat, such as Spam, we received as a joke.

  • Any stray cans of stuff that I bought on sale as a bachelor (but was too lazy to prepare) which archeological digs have uncovered in our pantry.

  • The annual can of clam chowder that I buy because I like clam chowder (but was too lazy to prepare). Because Heather doesn't like the the smell, she gets rid of the can by any means necessary.

  • A can of mandarin oranges. Where do they keep coming from?

  • A can or two of corn or beans that we have, which we would eat on our own but because we have an extra, we throw it in.

  • Any cans of french-cut green beans bought by mistake. Probably by me.
I mean, come on, it's charity. I give surplus and cast offs. Whenever someone starts telling me what to give, I think he or she is about one step away from telling me what he or she wants to take and one and a half steps away from just taking it.


 
To say Noggle, one first must be able to say the "Nah."