Monday, June 14, 2004
 
In-Utero-Americans

I thought I had mocked this story already, but I have not. What's to mock? What's not to mock about it? A fetus is an American citizen simply for gestating in this country:
    A U.S. District judge in Missouri has blocked temporarily the deportation of a pregnant Mexican woman who is married to a U.S. citizen, calling the fetus an "American" and citing a federal law created to protect unborn children after the high-profile death of Laci Peterson.

    Senior U.S. District Judge Scott O. Wright ordered that Myrna Dick, 29, of Raymore, Mo., who is accused of falsely claiming American citizenship, be allowed to remain in the United States for now and told prosecutors and the defense to prepare for a possible trial.

    "Isn't that child an American citizen?" he asked, according to the Kansas City Star. "If this child is an American citizen, we can't send his mother back until he is born."
Which might lead on to speculate...how long until states issue driver's licenses to in-utero-Americans, that persecuted minority, and how soon can they be enfranchised to vote in California?


 
To say Noggle, one first must be able to say the "Nah."