Musings from Brian J. Noggle

A Nickel's Worth of Free Advice

The St. Louis Regional Commerce and Growth Association has commissioned a highly-paid professional to come up with some suggestions about improving the business environment in St. Louis, according to the St. Louis Post-Dispatch.

The consultant offers a couple of suggestions as well as a couple of head pats for what this charming provincial little city on the frontier is doing right.

To summarize:

Those assets include affordable living, a renowned medical school and several unique cultural and historical amenities such as Forest Park, he said.

That's the head pat. This metro area of two million people has cheap housing, a medical school, and "unique" amenities like Forest Park. That sounds more like Columbia, Missouri.

The biggest drawbacks?

Often, however, talented workers leave the region because its corporate culture stifles entrepreneurs and leaves little opportunity for up-and-coming, creative employees, Kotkin said.
But in order to compete effectively with cities like Kansas City and Minneapolis, the region must first address several obstacles, including "standoffish attitudes toward outsiders, as well as a legacy of racial divisiveness," Kotkin said.

Uh huh. Neckties too tight, xenophobia, and racism. Platitudes, platitudes, and more platitudes for $75,000. I think I want to start a company called PlATTITUDES! and get in on this racket.

Here's my nickel's worth of free advice, St. Louis (and I address the city because no one else in the country understands the extreme difference between the city of St. Louis and the rest of us in St. Louis County):

Elevate the level of the elected officials in St. Louis. Let's face it, if they're peeing in trashcans during debates or pouring a pitcher of water on the adversaries as directed by the voices in your head, they're not governing, and they're only serving as trivial punchlines. This is what people from around the country see in your city.
Instead of world-class, tax-funded sports facilities for football, baseball, hockey, basketball, la crosse, volley ball, arena football, soccer, and tournament bridge, how about some world-class roads instead of the cheese graters you have downtown? I don't have an off-road vehicle. And I don't go downtown.
Hey, how about some tax cuts? I mean, I don't live or work in the city because I don't want to pay the one percent of vig the city taxes off of my earnings to pay for commissions that recommend world-class sports facilities and then paying for luxury boxes in said sports facilities for said commissions into perpetuity.
Hey, has the state removed the accreditation for your schools yet?

Hey, my advice's free, and it's better than the stuff assembled as a discussion of the $75,000 answer:

Some ideas already have been developed by a group of young professionals assembled by the RCGA to discuss the report. Those ideas include creating a system to welcome new workers to the area, devising a mentoring process to link executives with younger workers and establishing an annual entrepreneur contest.

That's what you get when you assemble young professionals whose neckties are too tight.

- posted by Brian J. @ 9:33 PM