Sunday, September 07, 2003
 
I Needed Help Turning My Computer On

I am an A+ Certified Computer Technician, werd, and when I built my sooper (for the time) PC from a collection of suh-weet parts (dualie, DDR ram, 128 Mb UGP video, the works), I put it all together and flipped the switch on the back, and....

Nothing. Power supply didn't start up or anything. As you techno-savvy people know, computer cases come with no doc whatsoever unless you buy the latest nuclear-plant models, so I kinda thought you flip that on and off switch in the back, wot? Who wouldn't think that?

So I ordered another sooper case and waited a couple days for it to come. When it did, I inadvertently turned on the switch and hit the reset button. Oh, wait, you see, it's got a power toggle switch on the back and a power button on the front! The back is absolute power, like the plug, and the front button turns the thing on when it's been shut off. Intuitive.

So I take a little umbrage when some TechDirty says:
    It appears that plenty of office workers are still quite uncomfortable with their computers. A new study has suggested that one in seven office workers doesn't even know how to turn their computer on. About 20% needed help in saving or printing a document. Companies are spending quite a bit of money employing extra IT staff just to help with these sorts of basic issues. Of course, I do wonder a little about this study. These are all the sorts of tasks that you really only need to be taught once: "You see that button? Good! Now, press it." Also, there's no indication what job functions these people held, so it's tough to determine if this really is a big deal.
I was talking about this with my beautiful wife just yesterday. Our neighbor, an active but elderly man in his 70s, got a hand-me-up computer from his techno-savvy son just so he, my neighbor, could see what computers and the Internet were all about. His son gave him a three minute overview, but after the son had left, our neighbor had to give him a call to learn how to turn the computer off.

You see, you press the button to turn it on, but you select a command from this menu to turn it off. Intuitive.

Makes me want to invite all you computer "designers" (overworked developers and engineers with other priorities in mind, no doubt, when you inflict these iniquities upon the end users) into a conference room with no windows and lock the door behind me so I can counsel you. With a SCSI cable, if necessary.

This, I guess, is what makes me a good tester (I make no assurance of quality except for the testing, thank you). I hate computers. It's like the Ben Kingsley character says to the little kid in the trailer for Searching for Bobby Fischer: "Do you hate your opponents?...They hate you."

Of course, when SkyNet becomes self-aware, I will be first on its list. Johnny C can wait. It's gotta make sure I don't needle the developers into patching its self-awareness first.

What was my point? Oh, yeah. Computers and their myriad and non-intuitive interfaces sux. Werd.

- posted by Brian J. @ 7:28 PM
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