Thursday, July 31, 2003
 
Layoff Warning Signs

MSN has a list of signs you're going to be laid off. While somewhat descriptive, it's obvious that a writer, and a "business" writer, composed this list.

You want to know if you're going to be laid off? Let your Paranoia Shidoshi, who has been laid off before (schnuck those schuckers), guide you.

You're facing impending layoff if:
  • The vice president in charge of your section suddenly knows your name, or employee number.

  • Colleagues no longer ask to borrow your office supplies; instead, they want to know where you hide yours.

  • You are reading this at work. So, how much time do you have?

  • You know the names of your children and you certain they're all yours.

  • You have not yet received any notice from your subdivision's Homeowner's Association about the length of your lawn or the state of your home.

  • A technical writer (or QA Engineer) named Brian J. sits in the cubicle next to you and says, "I am excited about this company's prospects!"

What to do?

As previously enumerated, you can:
  • Get into a job that cannot be done anywhere else. That includes construction, repair, and other location-utility trades.
  • Start your own business.
Or you can start sending your resumes out now.

- posted by Brian J. @ 9:30 PM
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