Musings from Brian J. Noggle
Thursday, November 30, 2006
 
Atari Apostasy at the St. Louis Post-Dispatch
Heresy!
    I do not remember the day I bought the Atari game, but I am absolutely certain that I did not wait in a line all night to get it. I'm sure because I would never have waited in line all night to obtain any toy — except for the firetruck set at Mr. Beavers' store which I never got when I was 8, but it's OK because I'm over it now.

    With the Atari attached to our TV, my then-preschool kids and I could shoot at each other from very crude depictions of jet fighters, or shoot at each other from very crude depictions of tanks, or go bowling with an imaginary ball which seemed indistinguishable from the missiles of jet fighters or the shells of tanks.

    I bored of it in about an hour. The kids, I think, gave up about 30 minutes after that.
It's been 20+ years and I'm not bored, as anyone who's attended our Atari Partys can surmise.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:25 PM   2 comments
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
 
Feds Get Their Man
Kirkwood man charged with impersonating a Marine:
    The FBI has arrested a Kirkwood man accused of impersonating a U.S. Marine and wearing a Navy Cross and other medals he did not earn.

    Michael Gerald Weilbacher, 48, of the 200 block of Horseshoe Drive was arrested by FBI agents last night, the U.S. Attorney's office said today.
So a guy puts on a uniform and goes to a ball to meet the chicks, and suddenly he's in Leavenworth?

Pardon me for being a chickenhawk child of two Marines, brother to only one, but damn, doesn't our federal law enforcement force (and its enabling Congress) have better priorities than to chase down false braggarts?

Well, our society has functionally eliminated shame as a deterrent/retributive factor (Michael Gerald Weilbacher, you're a lying sissy), so some groups think its necessary to protect the sensitive feelings our former soldiers by incarcerating some nitwit.

Pardon me if I suspect that perhaps this stems from some symbolic gesture sop thrown to our veterans in place of actual, you know, respect for those who served.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:10 PM   1 comments
 
Everyone Knows Fred Was The Poet
Google search of the day: tiger tiger burning bring in the middle of the night robert blake

You can take that to the bank
Where Love lay sleeping;
I heard among the rushes dank
Weeping, weeping.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:42 PM   0 comments
 
Trade Deficit
The number one grossing Australian entertainment act from last year? It wasn't Beccy Cole. It wasn't Nicole Kidman. It wasn't even AC/DC. Not even close:
    The Wiggles were Australia's top-earning entertainers last year, ahead of No. 2 AC/DC and No. 3 Nicole Kidman. The four men in brightly colored T-shirts, accompanied by a cast of characters including Dorothy the Dinosaur and Wags the Dog, grossed $39 million last year.
I am in the wrong business.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:11 PM   0 comments
 
Always the Last Place You Look
Bodies of 3 family members found in Lemay home:
    The bodies of three members of a Lemay family, missing since last week, have been found in the basement of their home, police sources said today.
Jeez, Louise, what, was it too spooky down there for the police to go down into the basement sometime last week after they shot dead the man who killed these people? This is Lemay, for crying out loud. If you stumble in the basement, you don't fall flat on the floor.

UPDATE: This keeps getting more embarrassing for county cops; apparently, it was a family member who found the bodies.


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:16 PM   1 comments
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
 
Book Report: Emma by Jane Austen (1996)
I picked up this book off of the discount rack at a regular book store. I probably paid a couple dollars for it and I am sure I wanted to impress Heather by looking smart and reading it. Some years later, I picked it up.

The edition, the Everyman Library paperback, is not the best edition aesthetically, which figures since it was on the cheap shelf. It's a paperback with lightweight paper and, most appallingly, rife with typographical errors.

Unlike when I read Kafka, I did not read the supporting introductory essay before I delved into the book. I did glance at the timeline of Jane Austen's life, though, to clarify the time period in which she was writing. I also admit that I read the back, which reveals the entirety of the plot as well as any Cliff Notes. It's just as well, though, since I could focus on the characterization and catch hints that I knew would indicate the conclusion.

The book centers on Emma Woodhouse, a 20-year-old daughter of gentry who has recently lost her nanny/confidante to marriage and who decides to help elevate a young lady of unknown origins. Miss Woodhouse decides to make a match (as one would expect in an Austen novel) for Miss Smith. Emma tries to set her up with the vicar, then the local gentleman farmer, and finally the son of her nanny's husband. Emma, the novel lets us know, is not as insightful into the human condition and heart as she thinks she is. She misinterprets signs, feelings, and motivations of almost everyone around her and eventually ends up attached to the local gentleman farmer. This summary is slightly more obscure than the back cover for your non-spoiler pleasure.

When reading historic novels, I often wander into thoughts of who the target audiences for these books would have been in the early 1800s when the book was out initially. Surely, it speaks of the upper class without disdain which is so fashionable in serious fiction now. It focuses on young (late teens or early 20s) people making matches and courting. I guess it was targeted to those markets, or merely whatever literates wandered England at the time. So it meant something different to them 200 years ago than it does now, but I read it just the same.

Well, that's all I got for now. I never really did go back to read the introduction nor the end material, but I have the luxury of reading this because I wanted to (and it was on my To Read shelves). I don't have to put together some sort of coherent paper (obviously) and defend arguments against the patriarchy vigorously enough to pass a class. Which is nice, in a way. In all ways, actually.

Books mentioned in this review:


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:31 PM   2 comments
 
You Can Buy Anything On Ebay
Matthew Browning bids for alderman position


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:02 PM   0 comments
 
Book Report: Sons of Sam Spade: The Private Eye Novel in the 70s by David Geherin (1980)
In February, I read Geherin's The American Private Eye: The Image in Fiction, and I mentioned having read Sons of Sam Spade in college. Sometime this summer, I found an ex-library copy at a bok fair, so I picked it up for a re-read. In the intervening fifteen years since I first read this book, Robert B. Parker has put out a number of books, including non-series novels and two new non-Spenser series, that really don't live up to the promise of his beginning four. I've also read several of the Roger L. Simon Moses Wine novels (The Lost Coast, California Roll, The Big Fix, and Peking Duck) and they probably live up to my preconception of them.

I haven't read anything by the third author covered, Andrew Bergman, but his work sounds interesting enough to look for when book fair season begins next summer.

The content of Sons of Sam Spade, like The American Private Eye, offer a nice summary of some of the late entrants (at the time) into the genre and makes a good, short respite from actually reading the genre. It's literary criticism, sort of, and I can enjoy it.

Books mentioned in this review:

         

- posted by Brian J. @ 5:46 AM   0 comments
Monday, November 27, 2006
 
A New Nightmare for Noggle
Bookcase 'trap' killed US woman:
    The body of a missing US woman has been found by her family, wedged upside down behind a bookcase in her room.

    Mariesa Weber, 38, is believed to have fallen over and become trapped as she tried to reach behind the bookcase to adjust the plug for a TV set.
Thanks, Ace.


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:33 AM   0 comments
 
The Cure for the Monday Blues
Johnny Cash singing "Hurt":



Remembering that all of your efforts, your failures, and your successes matter the same in the end really puts your simple little "I Squandered A Four Day Weekend and Am Back At Work" churlishness into perspective, ainna?


- posted by Brian J. @ 5:52 AM   2 comments
Saturday, November 25, 2006
 
AP Headline Misses Critical Word
Headline: Honduras fines U.S. subsidiary over alleged mercenary training.

That's odd, I didn't realize that the United States of America had subsidiaries.

Oh, wait:
    The Honduran government said Friday it has fined the local subsidiary of a U.S. company $25,000 for allegedly training more than 300 Hondurans and foreigners last year to work as mercenaries in Iraq.
Well, brevity is the soul of wit, headline writing, and negatively painting the big bad superpower inaccurately.

Reading the story, apparently the company was training people to work as security guards in Iraq, which means that I'll have to start calling Rose, the desk guard at the building in which I work, a mercenary since that's what the Honduran government would call her. But hey, free $25,000!


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:04 PM   0 comments
 
Just Helping Out
I have no idea what ex-girlfriend on Bothwell Glasgow means, but if there's one source for it in the world, it should be Boondoggled.


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:51 AM   1 comments
 
Backers and Leaders Want Gravy Train
In Milwaukee, another unelected authority has revived another way to spend the public's money: commuter rail:
    As soon as next month, regional leaders could start discussing whether to get aboard a $237 million plan to link Milwaukee, Racine, Kenosha and the southern suburbs with commuter trains.
This is no doubt in addition to the light rail initiatives. Normally, this would be a problem with a plan, but since it's a government authority, it's no reason to pause:
    Rail backers are touting the plan's expected economic benefits, while the new Southeastern Wisconsin Regional Transit Authority is wrestling with how to pay for the service.
If people wanted it, there would be a market for it, and perhaps a free market enterprise of some sort could provide it. But, nah, it's all about featherbedding authority positions and salaries for the participants.

Kudos, though, to the plan's originators. With full knowledge that there's no funding in place, they've come up with a plan that's even more expensive than the last one:
    In its latest form, the Kenosha-Racine-Milwaukee commuter rail line, or KRM Commuter Link, would offer more frequent service and more stops - but at a higher cost - than the version that emerged from a previous study in 2003.
Man, I wish I were a quasi-government functionary, shuffling papers and preparing plan documents for an exhorbitant salary. Unfortunately, I am cursed with self-respect.

UPDATE: Owen of Boots and Sabers, more proximate to the impending fiscal train wreck than I am, weighs in.


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:21 AM   0 comments
 
Britain To Reward Silent Killers
'Big Brother' cameras listen for fights:
    The system works by putting microphones in CCTV cameras to continually analyze the sound in the surrounding area. If aggressive tones are picked up, an alarm signal is automatically sent to the police, who can zoom in the camera to the location of the suspect sound and investigate the situation.

    "Ninety percent of violent cases start with verbal aggression," Van der Vorst said. "With our system, the police can respond a lot quicker to a violent situation."
Aggressive foreign powers can continue quietly poisoning dissidents, though.


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:10 AM   0 comments
 
I Call It My Personal Safety Zone
Recliner Saves Man Who Was Shot in Head:
    Now comes another reason to stay put in the La-Z-Boy: A man sitting in his easy chair was shot in the head by his wife, but the sturdy recliner absorbed most of the bullet's force and left him virtually unscathed.
The deep, plush padding will also offer excellent protection should the Earth stop spinning.


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:05 AM   2 comments
Friday, November 24, 2006
 
Pleasant Dreams
Yeah, I've had a lot of nothing to say lately. How could I, knowing that the killer bees coming is nothing compared to the unchecked northward march of the giant carnivorous centipedes?


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:56 PM   0 comments
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
 
Not What I Bargained For
CNN Headline: Seeing love in green and gold

Is it some article about new women's lingerie with the Packers logo, like these H-O-T-T! Packer panties?

No, it's some dumb writer or something.

Man, my heart started racing for a moment there.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:08 PM   0 comments
 
Advocacy Group Releases Poll Results Which Reinforce Group's Position
Poll results that promote the point-of-view of the commissioning group as news? Sure, if the poll knocks America:
    Rude immigration officials and visa delays keep millions of foreign visitors away from the United States, hurt the country's already battered image, and cost the U.S. billions of dollars in lost revenue, according to an advocacy group formed to push for a better system.

    To drive home the point, the Discover America Partnership released the result of a global survey on Monday which showed that international travelers see the United States as the world's worst country in terms of getting a visa and, once you have it, making your way past rude immigration officials.
Unfriendly ain't the worst that can happen to travellers to a foreign country, but it's awfully important to the make-feel-nice industries.

UPDATE: Once again, someone else discovers that I am dumb as a stump:
    - Musings from Brian J. Noggle, who misses the point. The poll isn't news because it "knocks America," it is news because how people around the world view America impacts America in a variety of very important ways.
Well, I didn't review the actual survey because I was not so inclined to delve into the material; instead, I wanted to point out, in my glib minimalist way:
  • The report is probably getting more media play because it reflects badly on America, albeit in a trivial way. Of course, I've got nothing to prove this, which is the beauty of glib minimalism. I just have to assert and rage against the machine. Take it for what it's worth, which is not much, but hey, it's a free site.

  • "Unfriendliness" in government officials is a relatively minor inconvenience compared to running into the religious police, getting shot during a civil uprising, or getting thrown in a foreign jail. But everyone has different priorities, I guess.

  • Regardless of its methodology, the survey's findings are trivial and ultimately unimportant. After all, it's measuring perceived unfriendliness of immigration officials. They're government bureaucrats. Ask anyone about any government official and you're likely to come up with an unfavorable reading on the old tricorder.

  • Finally, that a group of tourist-oriented companies would band together and find that tourism could be made better through some action of the government on their behalf is hardly shocking.
Still, I missed the point, which is changes to our immigration and visa policy to suit the needs of the study producers is good. No, I got that. Simple changes would benefit you. I got it.

But let's look at the study's other details (summary PDF) which can be spun otherwise than "U.S. is most unfriendly country to visitors." For example, once you get past the unfriendly, apparently they're not afraid of the things that frighten Americans:
    Immigration officials far outpace the threat of crime or terrorism as something international travelers worry about when considering coming to the US.
In spite of the raging unfriendliness, the visitors like the United States:
    • 63% of travelers feel more favorable towards the U.S. as a result of their visit.
    • 61% agree that, once a person visits the U.S., they become friendlier towards the country and its policies.
    • 72% report that once they get past government officials at the airport, the U.S. travel experience is "great."
    • Nearly 9 in 10 travelers tell their friends, relatives about their travel experiences most or all of the time.
And:
    • In every travel category but the point of entry experience, America ranks in the top three: travelers want to come to the U.S.
    • Travelers are willing to wait an average of 46.5 days to get a visa to visit the U.S.
    • More than 7 out of 10 travelers say that U.S. policies in the world would not stop them from visiting the U.S.
Yeah, it sounds a hell of a lot like the tourist street is rising up at our unfriendliness.

Meanwhile, since I am feeling minimalistly glib, allow me to mock some of the survey itself (survey results PDF). For starters, 100% of the survey respondents had travelled off of their continent in the preceding year and a half, so we're not talking about first time travellers. 65% are college graduates, compared to a thumbnail where college graduation rates by country top out at 40% (gathered here). The survey was taken on the Internet (or so I assume based on this question: "What regions have you traveled to? Just click on a region to indicate you have traveled there in the past 18 months."

So the survey looks at well-travelled, well-educated, well-connected people. The sort who might easily look down on stupid foreign government officials, maybe. But that's only what I assume based on my firsthand knowledge with frequent travellers abroad. Maybe I need to hang out with more down-to-earth jetsetters.

Now, here is our respondents' breakdown by country: What is your country of citizenship—that is, what country are you a citizen of?
United Kingdom 10
China 8
Russia 8
Venezuela 7
Brazil 7
Japan 6
Argentina 6
Korea 6
India 6
France 6
Germany 6
Australia 6
Colombia 6
Italy 5
Turkey 5
United Arab Emirates -
Other 4
Refused/not sure -
Now, let's look at the questions:
    Which ONE location on the map indicated BEST meets the requirement? Offers good value for the money/Has convenient air service from [respondent's country] and reasonable travel time
Let's look again at that list, broken out differently:
Respondents from Europe35
Respondents from Asia/Australia35
Respondents from South America26
To put that in perspective:
Respondents from a different hemisphere96 (minimum)
So tell me again how any of the responses about the US being a good value or being reachable in a "reasonable" amount of travel time might be hampered by the fact that we're a large ocean, a small ocean, or a pretty good sea away from the respondents? What, aren't the Canadians, the Mexicans, and the Caribbean people not worthy of an opinion?

I mean, heck's pecs, I think Illinois is a heckuva bargain for the travel dollar and is very convenient for travelling to. Because I can freaking walk there.

But I am belaboring my point when I could berecreate some other point which probably won't be blogged.

So let me make sure I am missing the point completely, because I rather hate to nick the point, or rather to merely backboard-rim the point instead of a complete air ball:

    A study commissioned by a group representing the tourism industry (neverminding projections that international travel to the United States will grow this year by 5.5% (source) has discovered that a number of well-travelled, well-educated, Internet-survey-taking foreign travellers think that U.S. immigration and customs officials are rude, and Reuters ran the story because of its ability to cast ill on America.
Because frankly, that is my point.

Regardless of whether the travel procedures are onerous, which I have no doubt they are, the proper way to encourage a meaningful reflection on the process is not to shout from the rooftops FOREIGNERS SAY AMERICA IS UNFRIENDLY, but particularly if you're trying to sell a solution to Americans.

Instead, perhaps an appeal to the generosity of Americans who want to share the experience of this beautiful nation and its myriad landscapes and culturescapes with other people who obviously view America favorably.

Oh, but no, I miss the point of a public policy initiative coming from a trade group based in Washington, D.C., who thinks the best mechanism to initiate American public policy reflection is the reproach of foreign opinion. Because I am a dumb, ugly, and unfriendly American, no doubt.


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:06 AM   6 comments
Sunday, November 19, 2006
 
The Press Pounces
You know why the Bush administration has chosen to provide a ludicrously self-confident front on its approach to the war on terror, when any reasonable person recognizes mistakes and setbacks that the president and his team seem loath to admit?

Because any crack in the unity plays like this: White House scrambles for exit strategy:
    A "stay-the-course" U.S. policy in Iraq has suddenly veered toward a "change-the-course" posture, but with little certainty about what it will be changed to.

    After three years of repeated insistences by President George W. Bush that he would accept nothing short of victory in Iraq and that the proper policy was in place to achieve that end, everything appears up in the air amid an intense flurry of new studies and proposals about the war.

    Which of the recommendations the White House will adopt is unclear, but rising public anger over the war reflected in the congressional elections has most observers believing the administration has little choice but to shift gears.

    "They're looking for a way out," Rep. Ike Skelton, D-Mo., said of the administration.
To its opponents in the other party and to the press, any reflection or re-evaluation is weakness.

Were this a less-than-family blog, I would express through creative invective my immediate, visceral reactions to this article, laden with a vocabulary designed to present through a funhouse mirror any thought of change into a desire to cut-and-run, hypocritically, from a fight we can win.

Personally, I regret that I have but one subscription to cancel to the St. Louis Post-Dispatch and that I did that long ago.


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:19 PM   0 comments
 
Book Report: The Mystery Reader's Quiz Book by Aneta Corsaut, Muff Singer, and Robert Wagner (1981)
Well. I bought this book cheaply at a book fair because I was already buying dozens of other books, so what could this one hurt? My pride, my friends, my pride.

For this book offers a hundred some pages of quizzes that cover the field of crime fiction mostly of the twentieth century, and as a trivia-lover, I fell very, very short.

I thought I was doing all right on the authors I know well. A couple of questions touched on the 87th Precinct series by Ed McBain. A couple on the Lew Archer books by Ross MacDonald. I even answered correctly a number of questions about Rex Stout's Nero Wolfe series, some of which I read in high school. But there's a great number of books, authors, and series in classical and frankly just 20th century fiction that I didn't get around to reading yet, although there's plenty of it to be read in the Noggle Library.

My final humbling came at the hands of a simple quiz that just wanted me to get the colors right in the titles of John D. MacDonald's Travis McGee series. It's been a year since I last touched one of these books, and some many more for most. I got a couple right--I can even see the cover for Free Fall in Crimson in my mind's eye since I just organized some of the read shelves this year, but ultimately, I fell very short. For an author whose books I really enjoyed and have, in several instances, read more than once.

Forget it, the Northside Mind Flayers trivia night team is no more, for I cannot even respect myself for my performance with this book.

But it was a quick browse, like a phone book. Only occasionally did my eyes fall upon a familiar name. The rest of the time I was turning pages without comprehension.

Books mentioned in this review:


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:49 PM   0 comments
 
Book Report: Nice Girls Do - And Now You Can Too! by Dr. Irene Kassorla (1980)
When you've got a self-help sex book with the dedication TO MY FATHER - Who taught me the meaning of tenderness with his soft cheeks and gentle hands, you know you're getting into some downright creepy psychoanalysis territory. To help women of the baby boom generation cope with their sexual hang-ups, Dr. Irene Kassorla has devised the PLEASURE PROCESS, a set of steps not actually recognized by ANSI or ISO. This process involves the usual good advice about sex:
  • Care about your partner.
  • Communicate with your partner.
  • Have sex with your partner.
However, it's wrapped in psychoanalysis that obviously traces all sexual hangups to interaction with the parents as a baby. Ergo, Dr. Kassorla invites you to free-associate while going at it, particularly if you're able to free-associate yourself to a repressed memory and its attendant guilt of a moment where your daddy was changing you and you were gloriously naked in the bassinet. If you're able to talk about that with your partner while you're both, um, busy, you'll get over the guilt that's held you back and will finally achieve orgasm.

I mean, ew. Please. No. That's not a test of whether your partner loves you, ladies; that's a test of whether your partner is listening to you. For his sake and for the sake of your relationship, I hope he's not.

Frankly, Irene Kassorla is no Marabel Morgan, and I'm glad Ruth Westheimer had Dr. Kassorla "disappeared" in the great sex therapist turf battles of the end of the disco era. Because frankly, I'm more hung up than when I started the book.

Books mentioned in this review:


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:34 PM   0 comments
 
Microsoft Helps Out
Error message from Hotmail:

Error message


Please note the steps to remedy the situation:
  • In your browser, click Refresh.
    As it's an HTML error page, refreshing the error page will simply redisplay the error page.

  • In your browser, click Back, and try again.
    The application redirected me immediately to this page when I tried to reach Hotmail.com; ergo, clicking back would take me back to the unrelated previous Web site I would have visited. In this case, since I went directly to Hotmail when I opened the browser, the Back button was not enabled at all.

  • Wait a few minutes and try again.
    I guess that's the only choice, really, and since it's the only choice, it should be the only hint.
Microsoft: It's some language for placebo.


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:58 PM   1 comments
 
Focusing on the Positive
At least the Bears game wasn't the most lopsided Packers loss this season.


- posted by Brian J. @ 3:23 PM   0 comments
Saturday, November 18, 2006
 
Another Vulnerability Revealed to Al-Qaeda
Schools look for ways to dispose of radioactive materials:
    School labs have used low-level radioactive materials safely for decades; experts say they're critical in teaching physics and chemistry. Sealed samples -- often leftovers from past experiments -- frequently are saved in closets and storerooms.

    But as teachers retire and containers get shoved aside to make way for new samples, it's easy for schools to lose track of what they've got, or to store them incorrectly, said Dr. Sandra West, an associate biology professor at Southwest Texas State University in San Marcos.
No doubt this story has put our high schools at risk, once Al-Qaeda gets finished ransacking antiques stores for lumeniscient clock faces, dumps for old smoke detectors, and garage sales for twenty year old microwave ovens.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:44 PM   0 comments
Friday, November 17, 2006
 
Finally, The Feds Are Involved
Google hit of the day: dangerous emus.

From the U.S. Department of Justice, no less.

Finally, the feds are wising up to the emu threat.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:26 PM   1 comments
 
Illinois Legislature: We Control The Horizontal, We Control The Vertical
State Senate passes $7.50 hourly rate:
    Amid warnings that it could cost jobs in border areas such as the Metro East, the Illinois Senate on Wednesday approved a $1 minimum wage increase that would keep the state's pay scale above Missouri's and ahead of a proposed federal increase.
Rate freeze plan clears committee:
    A proposal meant to spare consumers from double-digit electricity rate hikes next year easily cleared an Illinois House committee Tuesday, but its prospects of becoming law are uncertain.
Now that the Illinois state government has helped raise costs and hold prices down, making businesses' decisions easy by removing them, the only question the legislators are leaving to its entrepreneur class is: To what state should I move?


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:08 AM   0 comments
Thursday, November 16, 2006
 
Financial Advice from MfBJN
Remember, if your employer offers free coffee, you should drink as much as possible. Otherwise, you're just leaving money on the table.


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:38 AM   0 comments
 
Fortunately, Missouri Dogs Will Have Access To These Cures
Stem cell injections fight muscular dystrophy in dogs:
    Stem cell injections worked remarkably well at easing symptoms of muscular dystrophy in a group of golden retrievers, a result that experts call a significant step toward treating people.
Fortunately, with the passage of Amendment 2 in Missouri, our canines will have access to these treatments and our biotech companies will have access to the sweet, sweet taxpayer cash to solve dogs' problems.

But note:
    The study was published online Wednesday by the journal Nature. It used stem cells taken from the affected dogs or other dogs, rather than from embryos. For human use, the idea of using such "adult" stem cells from humans would avoid the controversial method of destroying human embryos to obtain stem cells.
So another lifesaving cure for an animal that doesn't require embryonic stem cells? Good thing we spent so much time and government effort in embryonic stem cell research!


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:35 AM   0 comments
 
Sporting Community Up In Arms Over Personal Seat Licenses (PSLs)
Sportswriters around the country have discovered their disdain for having to prepay merely for the right to pay for something.

Oh, wait, it's not PSLs; it's paying for the privilege of negotiating with a player:
    The Boston Red Sox can afford to and made the choice to pay $51 million just for the right to negotiate with a Japanese ballplayer. Sickening.
When the sports teams do it to loyal fans, it's a creative revenue strategy. When agents do it to sports teams, it's sickening.

I do see the subtle differences that make the moral equation opposite.


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:11 AM   0 comments
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
 
New Arms Race
Maybe I am reading too much into unrelated events, but these two things could indicate the beginning of an escalating arms race and tensions between two non-governmental entities. 1: Dam plans jeopardize Amazon, experts say.

2: Private Texas spaceport launches test rocket:
    A remote West Texas spaceport being built and bankrolled by Amazon.com founder Jeff Bezos launched a test rocket Monday for the first time.
So you have a dam threatening Amazon, and Amazon's founder bankrolling a rocket program. Only a fool would miss the obvious.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:42 PM   1 comments
Monday, November 13, 2006
 
Undeterred By Will of Citizens, Industry Group Vows To Seek Taxpayer Featherbedding Again
Tobacco tax defeat smacks hospitals:
    Missouri's hospitals weren't running for office last week, but they ended up among the losers.

    Voters rejected a proposed constitutional amendment that would have increased cigarette taxes by 80 cents a pack.

    Most of the money raised — about $289 million of the forecast $350 million — would have gone to Missouri's hospitals to help pay for the care of the state's lowest-income patients.

    The Missouri Hospital Association, the major supporter of the failed amendment, says it's not giving up.
That's the spirit, Missouri Hospital Association, you continue finding ways to have the taxpayers chip in to bolster your and your members' bottom lines. Don't give up.

Oh, I know, you're saying, "There goes MfBJN, attacking the poor again," but note, fellows, that any wide-ranging industry serves the poor. Just because it's health care doesn't mean it's exempt from my free market-loving scorn.

I mean, how many poor people could be served with the money spent in the Missouri Hospital Association's budget? Plenty, I would guess, but no doubt that capital is doing more good paying salaries and expenses for lobbyists who are self-selected to do the work for the poor.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:09 PM   1 comments
 
City of St. Louis to Deploy Red Tape To Deter Thieves
As the price of scrap metal has risen, bad men have begun stealing or destroying working and expensive equipment to get at the copper or aluminum within. The City of St. Louis will do something to help deter the thieves. No, not rigorous enforcement of existing laws nor increased patrols and police presence on the street. Perish the thought.

The city will introduce new regulations that deputize (and burden) private industry and inconvenience law-abiding citizens:
    Alderman Lyda Krewson has an idea of what to do. She's proposing a law requiring scrap buyers to pay only by check and to photograph, fingerprint and even take the license plate number of every seller.

    Police say the paper trail would help stop the scourge of thefts from businesses and homes that has risen with the price of recycled metals.
Because it's easier to catch businesses in breaking the law because they don't run as fast nor do they shoot back at law enforcement.

Red tape: It's like duct tape for the government.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:03 PM   0 comments
Sunday, November 12, 2006
 
All Veterans The Same to St. Louis Post-Dispatch
The St. Louis Post-Dispatch profiles a veteran for Veterans' Day. Lest we think the paper might lavish some attention on an American veteran or, hell, even an ally who fought with the Americans in some war or another, don't worry: the Post-Dispatch sepia-tones an opposing soldier from World War I:
    On this Veterans Day, consider that rarest of veterans, Walter Heiman of University City.

    First, he’s 105 years old and a World War I veteran.

    Second, in WWI, he wore the field-gray uniform of the German army.
Funny, I don't think the paper would have profiled a Confederate soldier or a Nazi soldier with the same affection, but World War I is just forgotten enough that the paper hopes we can help celebrate all sides and all veterans the same. Or maybe it hopes we can celebrate our opponents and keep them close to our hearts at all times.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:09 PM   0 comments
Saturday, November 11, 2006
 
Book Report: Assassin of Gor by John Norman (1970,1973)
Now I remember where I got these books; I bought them at Patten Books for a couple dollars each after I discovered how well they sold on eBay. Unfortunately, I would also later discover that the books available in bookstores tended toward the later, less salable editions. In a final stroke of ill luck, I started reading the ones I couldn't sell and found they were okay. So now I go into bookstores looking to buy them and might, someday, float ludicrous sums of money to buy back the very books I once bought for fifty cents and sold at great profit.

But I digress. This, the fifth book in the series, finds Tarl Cabot disguised as an assassin hunting someone who wanted to kill him in his rebuilding home city of Ko-Ro-Ba. He travels to Ar and enters the employ of a slaver to find out what he can about his adversaries. In the course of having his vengeance, he aids a plot to overthrow the leaders of that city.

Again, the main character is strong, assertive, and still a pawn of things he only half-understands. The book continues some of the serial story alluding to a bigger payoff and bigger plots to come in the series.

I remembered where I got these books because I returned to Patten Books to fill in the gaps in my set. I picked up 1, 2, 6, 7, and 10, which means I now only lack 9 of the first 10. Although Patten had a number of the later books, I held off on spending the sums to which I alluded (over $20 for at least one of the paperbacks) until I get a better sense of whether I'll enjoy the books that late in the series. The earlier books remained in print for a long time, making them cheap and plentiful, whereas the later books are expensive because they had fewer printings. Whether this is due to quality drop-off or the backlash against the books that arose in the 1980s, I'm unsure, but I'm certainly not spending good liquor money on those books yet.

But all signs indicate that I'll buy 11 sometime in the next year or so.

Books mentioned in this review:


- posted by Brian J. @ 12:25 PM   1 comments
 
Book Report: The Spy Who Never Was & Other True Spy Stories by David C. Knight (1978)
I bought this book this year at the Carondolet Y Book Fair, I think. It's back when I thought I might write for Damn Interesting, so I purposefully sought out compendia like this that would give me inspiration for stories I could write. I never got the gig, but I do have a number of interesting books to read.

It's only after I cracked this book open that the brevity coupled with the large print size indicated that this might be a juvenile book. That's okay, though, as I am often juvenile.

The book contains a number of short chapters on famous spies through history, including Mata Hari, Nathaniel Hale, Gary Powers, and Rudolf Abel. Aside from these well-known figures, the book also covers Major William Martin (see, it is Damn Interesting sort of material); Velvalee Dickinson, spy for Japan in World War II; Peter Ortiz, Marine reserve and leader of the French resistance in WWII; and others. The brief chapters and simple language make it a very quick read and serves as trivia fodder or a source for further investigation.

So it was worth my time, even if I'm three times the age of its target audience. Plus, it's the 76th book I read this year. So there.
Books mentioned in this review:


- posted by Brian J. @ 12:06 PM   0 comments
 
Hollywood Salutes Veterans
Hey, it's opening weekend for Harsh Times, a movie about a violent ex-Army Ranger shooting the hell out of Los Angeles because he likes killing.

Thank you for your disservice, Hollywood.


- posted by Brian J. @ 10:48 AM   0 comments
Friday, November 10, 2006
 
Worst Storm Season Ever Thanks To Man-Made Global Warming
Well, why aren't the climate experts making that claim? Because the bad storms are happening on Saturn:
    NASA says its Cassini spacecraft has found a hurricane-like storm at Saturn's South Pole, nearly 5,000 miles across -- or two-thirds Earth's diameter.

    "It looks like a hurricane, but it doesn't behave like a hurricane," said Andrew Ingersoll, a member of Cassini's imaging team at the California Institute of Technology in Pasadena, Calif. "Whatever it is, we're going to focus on the eye of this storm and find out why it's there."
Maybe it's an ozone hole or something on account of all the CFCs.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:26 PM   3 comments
 
A Startling Turn of Events
In a startling turn of events, when the price of something goes up, consumers buy less of it. This holds true of labor, where the St. Louis Post-Dispatch has performed some hard-hitting post-election journalism to discover that businesses will hire fewer employees at minimum wage now that the state's citizens have ordered businesses to do so:
    26 percent increase in Missouri's minimum wage to $6.50 an hour will hit urban and rural workers hardest because some may lose their jobs or not be hired as businesses adjust to hold down costs, some business owners and analysts say.
So Missourians have elected to lessen customer service to themselves and to promote the use of illegal immigrants whereever possible (it's not that they do jobs Americans don't want, but they do take pay that Americans cannot).

Meanwhile, in Illinois, the re-elected Governor Rod Blagojevich cannot wait to impose an additional hiring freeze in his state:
    Two days after his re-election, Gov. Rod Blagojevich wasted no time spending some political capital on what had been one of his biggest campaign promises: raising the minimum wage, again.

    Such a campaign pledge had helped Blagojevich win his first term in 2002 and it became a pledge he made good on when he signed a $1.35-an-hour hike above the federal level in the summer of 2003.

    On Thursday, he called his proposed $1 hike, which would raise the minimum wage to $7.50 an hour, his "first order of business" as the legislature returns for its fall session next week.
Meanwhile, in the bowels of the Power-to-the-People headquarters in Missouri, the master tacticians have begun their planning for agitation for the next attempt to raise the minimum wage in Missouri or select parts thereof to a "living wage" because the electoral victory on Tuesday was only the latest victory in a struggle to make the job market equal. In which half the people make a living wage of some sort or another, and the other half are unemployed.


- posted by Brian J. @ 5:50 AM   0 comments
Thursday, November 09, 2006
 
Not A Lot Of Snark To Be Found
The return of the Electric Venom Snark Hunt (now called the "Carnival of Snark") looks to be a little light.

No doubt next week will be more chock full of pith once everyone sees she really means it.


- posted by Brian J. @ 5:54 AM   0 comments
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
 
Election Results!
Preposition 1: Will Brian go to work today?

   Yes 111,110     No: 85,109     Passing


Amendment A: Will Brian take the trash to the curb on Wednesday night, as in past Wednesday night?

   Yes 191,688     No: 4,531     Passing



Proposition B: Will Brian J. read a portion of one or more books as recreation this evening, whose summaries he will report on his blog to the great acclaim of Just D?

   Yes 8     No: 1     Passing



Household Leader: Who will run the household?

Brian (Daddy): 1
Heather (Mommy): 781
Jimmy Ray (Dep.): 2,548,159


In other words, more of the same.


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:04 AM   1 comments
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
 
Election Update!
I voted. Now, I am going to drink a little wine and read a bit of classical literature.

Because, gentle reader, this Republic will go on beyond tonight, beyond the tallies, beyond tomorrow.

Regardless of what the panting pamphleteers of pixels say tonight.


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:34 PM   0 comments
 
Greenland Tourist, Agriculture Industries Salivate
Greenland ice sheet shrinking fast: NASA:
    The vast sheet of ice that covers Greenland is shrinking fast, but still not as fast as previous research indicated, NASA scientists said on Thursday.

    Greenland's low coastal regions lost 155 gigatons (41 cubic miles) of ice each year between 2003 and 2005 from excess melting and icebergs, the scientists said in a statement.
Well, it's about time it lived up to its name.

Long live the Greenland banana plantations!


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:39 PM   1 comments
 
AP Disses Columbia, Missouri
Town cracks down on rowdy Mizzou parties:
    Tired of off-campus parties that are anything but fun for nearby homeowners, officials in this university community have unanimously approved a new crackdown on rowdy party hosts -- and the hosts' landlords.

    The ordinances were approved Monday. They include tougher punishments for loud or rowdy social gatherings of 10 or more people and define 16 different nuisance activities, from drug dealing and prostitution to littering and blocking traffic.

    Violations can result in fines ranging from $500 to $4,000. In the case of repeated nuisance parties, the city could close the property for up to one year, the Columbia Missourian reported today.
100,000+ tends to rate as a city, unless you're an AP headline writer confronting a location in the Midwest. No doubt, this bucolic little community has indoor plumbing, mostly, too.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:37 PM   1 comments
 
Natural Gas Prices Fall; Will Anyone Blame Bush?
Laclede asks to reduce rate:
    Overwhelmed by higher prices to heat their homes and fill their gas tanks over the last few years, some area residents may get a reprieve.

    Laclede Gas Co., which serves St. Louis and surrounding Missouri counties, has filed for a 13 percent reduction in fuel costs, reflecting lower wholesale prices for natural gas, which is used to heat most homes. Gas rates for Ameren Corp. customers in Missouri and Illinois already have been cut.
Who will be the first to blame the failed economic policies of the President? Hah, trick question, no one, because this is a transparent ploy on the part of Big Rotten Dinosaur to influence the election!

Also, it's funny to note the following misprinting that's probably due to a failure in the filling in of the Mad Libs template for utility stories:
    Bills for Laclede residential customers would fall an average of almost $14 a month under the filings last week with the Missouri Public Service Commission. The increase is based on monthly usage of about 93 therms and "normal" temperatures, according to St. Louis-based Laclede.
Sticking it to the poor and using cheap prices to make them dependent on the heat. Or something.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:31 PM   0 comments
 
Chuck Norris In Iraq
I bet this made some troops' days:
    Corporals John W. Wright and Lazaro A. Castillo, intelligence specialists with Headquarters Company, 1st Marine Logistics Group (Forward), and Cpl. Romel M. Estremadura, a member of the 1st MLG Personal Security Detachment, earned these bragging rights and their present rank during a special promotion ceremony here Nov. 2.

    Gen. Robert Magnus, Assistant Commandant of the Marine Corps, along with action stars Marshall Teague and Chuck Norris, joined a military formation of 20 service members to promote the three Marines.
How cool would that be? I mean, I'm just a QA guy, and I guess the equivalent would be for Loki to tell me, "Nice job."

(Link seen on Ace of Spades HQ.)


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:28 PM   0 comments
 
The City Is Back....In The Stone Age
When we looked for a new home last winter, our real estate agent mentioned that there were some really nice houses in the city of St. Louis. No thanks, I said; I already have to pay a city income tax for the luxury of getting to work there. I don't need to suffer through what I pay for.

Unfortunately, this fellow cannot say the same:
    I live and work in the City of St. Louis. There is no greater advocate for this community than I. St. Louis is a place blessed with a rich history and noble heritage, with beautiful buildings and vibrant communities, with art and science and a wonderful mix of small town charm and big city style.

    However, the City of St. Louis itself is dying, thanks primarily to decades of liberal/Democrat control, which has done everything possible to drive out the upper and middle class citizens and ruined many blessings with which this once great city had been endowed. St. Louis is a classic example of what happens when Democrats and Liberals hold dominion unopposed over a community for a long period of time. It is a Democrat utopia.
It sucks, for sure. But it's nothing a new soccer stadium for Dave Checketts wouldn't cure.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:14 PM   0 comments
Monday, November 06, 2006
 
Altria Takes Note
Back when I was a kid, these were called "candy cigarettes":

Candy Sticks

Of course, back when I was a kid, you could buy dried tobacco products ready-made. But that was before eager taxation proponents passed continual waves of legislation designed to raise money on a socially-unaccepted product. Waves of legislation that had unintended consequences.

Which is why we'll buy dried tobacco in the produce section someday soon. Because dried tobacco isn't cigarettes, you see.

Neither are "candy sticks", but it's good to see that all the candy cigarette machinery didn't get rusty.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:59 PM   0 comments
 
Another True Internet Fact from MfBJN
Originally, Sudoku was named Countdoku, but then the Lucasfilm attorneys sent a letter. The rest, they say, is numerology. Or history. Or what have you.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:35 PM   0 comments
 
No Relation (I Hope)
Not that you were asking, but this is no relation of mine:
    A man from Illinois is accused of killing a man from Bland this week. The Phelps County Sheriff’s Department says Michael Noggle of Cahokia is charged with first-degree murder after the body of James Gaylord was found under a bridge northwest of Rolla Wednesday.
At least, I don't think so.


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:33 PM   0 comments
 
Power to the Prosecutors!
Well, not exactly, but "backers" want to give police more excuses to stop people in cars: Missouri wants what Illinois has: a tougher seat belt law:
    Backers of a tougher seat belt law in Missouri are holding a pep rally next week to get psyched up for the upcoming legislative battle in Jefferson City. They're about to take another crack at a primary seat belt law.

    Police in Missouri can write a ticket for not wearing a seat belt only if the motorist was pulled over for another violation. A primary seat belt law, which has failed in the legislature every year since 2000, gives police authority to pull people over solely for not buckling up.
As a former young man who rode in motor vehicles, I understand this really isn't about giving police a pretext to stop you and check your story, since they'll do that for license plate light infractions that aren't, wow, look at that, infractious. This will, however, give them a reason to stop people and part them from some of their money.

To save a projected 90 lives a year. But that's projected, whereas the loss of freedom and the loss of citizens' money, will be real.


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:28 PM   0 comments
 
From the Continent That Invented Totalitarianism
A centralized power grid with a single failure that affects numerous cities in numerous countries shows itself as an example of a needed solution. That solution, of course: more centralization.

    One of the worst and most dramatic power failures in three decades plunged millions of Europeans into darkness over the weekend, halting trains, trapping dozens in lifts and prompting calls for a central European power authority.

    The blackout, which originated in north-western Germany, also struck Paris and 15 French regions, and its effects were felt in Austria, Belgium, Italy and Spain. In Germany, around 100 trains were delayed, and in the French capital firemen responded to 40 calls from those trapped in lifts late on Saturday night.
The only thing that more centralization cannot solve, to some people, is the hunger for more consolidation of power into their hands.


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:17 PM   0 comments
Sunday, November 05, 2006
 
Bill McClellan Opposes Medical Research As Its Discoveries Would Be Expensive
At least, I think that's the point he meanders to in his column today:
    Medical care is already expensive. Without health insurance, the most expensive treatments are beyond the reach of even an affluent citizen. Consider bone marrow transplants. This is the most common adult stem cell therapy, and technology-wise, it's horse-and-buggy stuff compared with what might be coming in the not-distant future. And what does this horse-and-buggy stuff cost? Approximately $100,000.

    So what would we do? If the insurance companies have to foot the bill for the new technology, rates would have to rise, and maybe rise steeply.

    This would compound the problem we already can barely ignore about health insurance. Millions of Americans don't have any. We're able to ignore this only because most middle-class people have at least some semblance of health insurance, but if rates go up, what then? Could we become a society in which some people — the most affluent — are able to get new organs while many go without even basic treatment?

    More likely, we will have to make some very difficult decisions. Who will get the cutting-edge treatment and be allowed to cheat death? I think about a spiritual man in his mid-60s, a man who used to dress as a horse for Shakespeare in the Park. Would he make the cut?
Never mind how the free market would eventually balance this out by finding more cost-effective solutions so health care providers could make money by applying the cures to new people with smaller budgets. Nah, let's just grab that precise moment of maximum suck, where it's no longer impossible but remains prohibitively expensive, and extrapolate to indict.... I don't know who McClellan's trying to indict here. Health care? Researchers? Opponents of Amendment 2? All of the above?


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:21 PM   0 comments
Saturday, November 04, 2006
 
Razors, Meet Wrists
Kate at Electric Venom needs your suggestions for the 50 Most Depressing Songs so she can build a playlist to help her in her NaNoMoWri or whatever that thing is efforts.

Man, I just recollected the old mixed tapes and playlists I created for myself to serve as backdrop music when I bled my passions to the page, and just remembering those depressing songs has kinda bummed me out. Well-played, maestros.

(Oh, yeah, I did list some in her comments, but I'm not going to recreate them for you here, gentle reader, because it would hurt just too much.)


- posted by Brian J. @ 10:05 PM   1 comments
 
How Many Of These Things Are You Old Enough to Remember?
In a sidebar to an article entitled "Whatever Happened To...." by Rose Madeline Mula, the Saturday Evening Post asks that question. Here's the list, with the ones I remember in bold:
  • Blackjack chewing gum (It and its cousins made a brief comeback in the 1980s.)
  • Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water
  • Candy cigarettes
  • Soda-pop machines that dispensed bottles
  • Coffee shops with tableside jukeboxes (Come on, some retro places still have these.)
  • Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers
  • Party lines (We had them in Jefferson County, Missouri, until 1987 or 1988.)
  • Packards (But I do remember Packard Bells.)
  • P.F. Flyers (But I do remember Radio Flyers. Metal Radio Flyers.)
  • Butch wax
  • Peashooters
  • Howdy Doody
  • S&H Green Stamps (Not Eagle Stamps. See this post from April 2006.)
  • Hi-fi systems
  • Newsreels before the movie
  • 45-RPM records...and 78-RPM records (I still own some 45s.)
  • Telephone numbers with a word prefix (e.g., Olive-6933)
  • Metal ice trays with levers (See this post from March 2006)
  • Mimeograph paper (And the glorious smell of the ink and the warmth of the fresh copies.)
  • Blue flashbulbs
  • Rollerskate keys
  • Cork popguns
  • Drive-in theatres
  • Studebakers
  • Washtub wringers
That makes me 14 of 25, and I am not yet 35. So although this list shouldn't make me feel old since its items are not older than the 1980s in many cases, I think the ery fact that I have a subscription to the Saturday Evening Post should suffice.


- posted by Brian J. @ 12:23 PM   1 comments
Friday, November 03, 2006
 
Conspiracy Theory Du Jour
The evidence is clear; the Dow Jones average, widely reported in the media as a snapshot financial harbinger or at least simple box score of the nation, is trending downward the week before the election, from a high of almost 12,150 on Monday to about 12,020 at the close of business yesterday. This can mean only one thing:

Billionaire George Soros is manipulating the stock market to affect the election!

Because I understand that these days all portents and augury has something to do with stolen or rigged elections. I thought I would read some guts, too.


- posted by Brian J. @ 5:54 AM   0 comments
Thursday, November 02, 2006
 
An Easy Solution Presents Itself
The problem: Overfishing and pollution are going to end seafood as we know it:
    Clambakes, crabcakes, swordfish steaks and even humble fish sticks could be little more than a fond memory in a few decades. If current trends of overfishing and pollution continue, the populations of just about all seafood face collapse by 2048, a team of ecologists and economists warns in a report in Friday's issue of the journal Science.
The MfBJN solution: Raise the earth's temperature a few degrees! The rising temperatures will melt the ice caps, providing more ocean to dilute the pollution and will submerge coastal areas, providing rich new habitats for our tasty waterbound friends.

Now, to get a government grant to turn this pithy blog post into a couple years' worth of easy living and a couple hundred pages of obscure, hesitant prose.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:58 PM   0 comments
 
Freelancing for John Kerry
William Squire posted some ghostwritten jokes for John Kerry, who recently bombed with a "botched joke":
    You know, education, if you make the most of it, if you study hard and you do your homework, and you make an effort to be smart, uh, you, you can do well. If you don’t, you get stuck in Iraq.
Whereas I do not think Mr. Squire was entirely ingenuous (or whatever the opposite of disingenuous is), I wholly sincerely offer up my own services as a humorist for Mr. Kerry. Here, then, are my sample jokes:
    Why did the uneducated soldier fiddle with his car radio's FM dial?
    Because it was stuck on 96.7 Z-Rock, and he was looking for some of that hillbilly music they listen to in the Midwest.

    Why did the firemen need the jaws of life for the uneducated soldier who was fiddling with his car radio's FM dial?
    Because he lost control of his vehicle, rolled it down an enbankment, and was stuck in his IROC.

    Why didn't the uneducated, not trying to be smart soldier give Senator Kerry the ascot the Massachussetan asked for?
    The uneducated soldier didn't know it was stuck on the tie rack!
See, I'm marginally more amusing than the senator's current writers.

I'm available for low, low rates!


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:38 PM   0 comments
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
 
Book Report: Whodunits by Pocket Puzzlers (2000?)
I know, what's next, book reports on Dell mini mags? But I read this book and it's 96 pages, so it's thicker than some of the tracts I've covered here. It's a tiny little octo or whatever you would call it with a number of crime-related puzzles. You're supposed to figure them out and look up the answer in the back to see if you're right. The book's stories are split between logic puzzles, the kind you're supposed to draw grids for and mark off the inferences from a finite number of statements of fact such as "One of the suspects is a liar," and the more Encyclopedia Brownish spot-the-inconsistencies. I prefered the latter, mainly because I read this in bed often and didn't have pen and paper to do the logic puzzles.

I paid a quarter for it at a book fair (Carondolet 2006? Oh, it's so hard to tell). It's worth it if you can get a cheap copy if you remember Encyclopedia Brown fondly.

Books mentioned in this review:


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:40 PM   1 comments
 
A Little Inference Never Hurt Nobody
When you're married, sometimes you let a little inference work for you. It's not deception, exactly. For example:
    I said: Should I take the leftover Halloween candy to work?
    She inferred: To share with coworkers.
    I really meant: For lunch.
Everyone's happy. Except maybe my coworkers.

UPDATE: Number of SweeTarts that it takes until you begin to hallucinate: 597.


- posted by Brian J. @ 5:48 AM   0 comments
To say Noggle, one first must be able to say the "Nah."