Very Popular in Shrewsbury
Got a banned dog breed? Disguise it as a poodle.

(Link seen on The Agitator.)


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:36 PM   0 comments

 
Book Report: Shopgirl by Steve Martin (2000)
I bought this book for like a buck at the Jewish Community Center book fair this year, fully conscious that I risked my life to help fund the organization and to add to my library. Sad, I know, but in this modern world, I did note the dangers of being near a Jewish center. If I hadn't gone, the terrorists would have won. Also, I would not have gotten a good deal on some books I have been meaning to buy.

This book, though, doesn't fall into the class of books I've been meaning to buy, but I bought it never the less. I've been intrigued by Steve Martin's writing forays, in a "if they fall into my lap" sort of way, for some time. I liked Bowfinger, which Martin wrote. I've heard good things about L.A. Story, which Martin also wrote. I dragged my poor wife to see a local community theatre production of Picasso at the Lapin Agile (Crikey, soon to be a major motion picture). I'd heard about Martin's work for The New Yorker. So I wanted to read something on my own. Okay, I probably had read somewhere about the movie version of this film, too. So I bought it. I spent like a buck, okay?

This novella (130 pages) describes a glove department salesperson and her involvement with an older, rich computer guy and how they define intimacy and how it helps them both along in the long run. To make a short book shorter, there you go.

The story is presented entirely in the present tense but for some future tense foreshadowing. The tense choice isn't particularly jarring, however, to those of us used to past tense whether in third person or first person. I thought the first portion of the book interesting, as the characters develop in their (purposefully limited) fashion. However, when the relationship progressed, it got a little wearing (but not for long--this ain't Tolstoy). Finally, the end and the resolution seems a bit forced and chopped. Perhaps this would have made a better short story with less, a better novel with more. Or maybe it's a good prose screenplay--I'll have to catch the film version sometime later to compare (probably after Sharky's Machine).

Still, it's not a bad work if you can get it cheap. If you cannot and want to see what this wild and crazy guy writes like, click the helpful link below. You, gentle reader, have the ability to put MfBJN over the check-cutting threshold from the Amazon Associates program sometime before never.

Books mentioned in this review:


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:45 PM   0 comments

 
We're Just CB Radio in Web Browsers Redux
Lieberman, ‘Snakes' and the seductive mythology of the blogosphere:

If ever America needed a wake-up call about the mythology of blogging, we got it this month.

On Aug. 8, Connecticut businessman Ned Lamont defeated U.S. Sen. Joe Lieberman in the Democratic primary, a triumph widely credited to the rah-rah racket produced by pro-Lamont armies stationed along the Internet.

Indeed, the bloggers had scored big. They had helped vault a local politician to national prominence and cemented the Iraq war as Issue No. 1 in the congressional elections. Not a bad day.

But their victory was short-lived. Even before the primary, Lieberman announced that, should he lose, he'd still run in November as an independent. This electoral chutzpah effectively rope-a-doped the bloggers and recharged the senator's fabled Joe-mentum. Lieberman's still the man to beat in the general election.

If this wasn't enough to drain the effervescence from the blogger bubbly, America's noisy Web wags were dealt an even more sobering blow 10 days later when Snakes on a Plane opened nationwide to a decidedly flat $15.3 million box office.

Before its premiere, Snakes had been the latest blogger darling, as swarms of online film geeks prematurely crowned it the summer's big sleeper. This hyperventilating fan base even convinced Snakes' distributor, New Line Cinema, to up the movie's rating to R, to ensure a gorier, more venomous snake fest.

But all that clapping and yapping couldn't put enough fannies in the seats. Ticket sales for Snakes' debut barely topped those of Talladega Nights, which was already in its third week.

I've said it before and I'll say it until I'm proven otherwise: blogs are CB radio with permalinks.

And we know how much CB changed the face of citizen media in the 1970s. It spawned a number of books, three Smokey and the Bandit movies, and Convoy. Some of its slang lives on, but you don't see many cars with the antennae on their roofs any more, do you?


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:22 PM   0 comments

 
Informal Caucus Recommends Republican Nominee
Here in Missouri, we convened the informal Republican caucus that occurs during the family reunion, usually after the barbecued dinner, when the fat cat elder statesmen of the family and I gather in the living room of my uncle's home and commune in the warmth of similar opinions. Although we tend to all lean Republican, we espouse different basic philosophies. But over barbecue, turkey, or ham, we come together to share brief commentary on the sad state of the world and those darn liberals.

Cousin Tat, a doctor, represents a seemingly evangelical bent, almost a liberation theology knowledge of scriptures combined with personal belief translated to action. He's concerned about the environment, the corrupting effect of money in politics, and promoting alternative and holistic medicines and treatments. Still, he doesn't believe the media is telling the truth, and he tends to deplore the Democrats more than the Republicans.

Uncle Jim, a realtor, comes from the socially and fiscally conservative milieu. He attends church every Sunday, sits on the boards of several charitable organizations, and participates in the local Republican party extensively.

Uncle Mike, an information technology professional, uses Clinton as an invective, trends isolationist on foreign policy, and thinks the federal government spends too much money.

Me, I'm a libertarian-conservative who votes futilely for the Libertarian candidate when I'm upset with the Republican incumbent or just to burnish my independence. I think the best government balance would be a Libertarian legislature passing few laws and a Republican administration rigorously enforcing them.

So we gathered in the tastefully-appointed living room, let our belts out, and looked beyond the 2006 elections toward the 2008 presidential election. After deriding the Bush administration for its immigration policy and the wildly out-of-control spending afforded us by the “winning” combination of a Republican president and a Republican legislature seeking to be compassionately conservative, but mostly re-elected.

Uncle Jim lamented the lack of an obvious candidate. John McCain won't do, we agreed. Besides, Uncle Jim—or maybe it was Tat—said, he knew some people who'd heard from someone in another legislator's office that McCain was a real hothead. Not to mention the McCain-Feingold Act. Come to think of it, I didn't mention it, but it's why I'll not vote for McCain again, even though I contributed in 2000.

What about Guiliani? I said.

The social conservatives won't come out and vote for him, Uncle Jim said.

They'll come out to vote against Hillary, I said.

No way. My uncle sounded like he was already penciling in other plans for the first Tuesday in November.

He'll prosecute the war on terror, I said.

Even though Uncle Mike doesn't think that the United States should be the world's policeman, he was for Guiliani. But Uncle Jim insisted that the social conservatives wouldn't vote for Giuliani.

I flipped through my brain's pages for the lists of contenders to whom the blogosphere and the newspapers are paying early attention. George Allen came to mind. But I didn't want to explain to them who he was. Matt Blunt will be old enough, I said. The Missouri Governor will turn 35 by the election, and I had once run a small-time blog called Draft Matt Blunt 2008.

Perhaps his dad could pull a few strings, Uncle Jim said, but the rest of the group didn't think Blunt had a chance. I mentioned that in 1992, an unknown governor from Arkansas had come out of nowhere to win the presidency, but ultimately, we knew that Matt Blunt wasn't the man around whom we and the party could rally.

I thought about strong, effective, charismatic executives who were born in this country and whom the nation recognized and respected. Probably not Missourian John Ashcroft, whose name has become synonymous with overreaching government authority and covering statues' breasts. I remembered Tommy Thompson, former governor of Wisconsin. They still like him well enough in Wisconsin, a state that tilted Democrat last time. He also served in the cabinet in the Bush Administration, but not in a department anyone pays much attention to. Then, I thought, that's the wrong Thompson.

Fred Thompson, I said.

He was going to nail Clinton until John Glenn traded all his respect for a ride in space, Uncle Mike said.

You know, everything that comes out of his mouth is common sense, Uncle Jim said. I've heard a rumor that he is going to replace Paul Harvey.

He's got a good voice and he's recognized, I said. He plays a lot of good guy roles.

Who's Fred Thompson? Cousin Tat said. After an explanation that the man was an actor and a former senator, Tat still couldn't place him. However, Uncle Mike drew the Ronald Reagan comparison.

So there you have it, men in power in the party: 75% of the caucus in that large suburban home in the middle of the country approved of Fred Thompson for president, and the other 25% hadn't heard of him. He will be recognized by much of the voting public, has bona fide conservative credentials, and has gravitas (but that's so 2000).

Fred Dalton Thompson is an experienced legislator, but not one who held office long enough to feel its corruption. He left office of his own accord to pursue a lucrative career that doesn't require schmoozing current legislators or offering them campaign contributions or kickbacks. He offered a stern, strong voice of national defense when he narrated the Citizens United ad about terrorism and Iraq. So if he wants to take a pay cut from network television and movies, he should be our man in 2008. He unites the party, or at least our small portion of it, like no one else does.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:35 PM   16 comments

 
Ask Dr. Creepy: I Need Some Boss Wheels On A Budget
Dear Doctor Creepy,
I am finally on my own since I have my mother's basement all to myself! I've finally paid my student loans from three semesters of community college with the wages I made at the mall's Sunglass Hut and then the mall's theatre after the Sunglass Hut manager fired me because nobody would stop at the shop when I was on duty. Now, I've put some money into my "savings account"--a hollowed-out Strawberry Shortcake on my nightstand, and I'm thinking about what kind of car I could get to replace my Schwinn. I've looked at some of the cars with For Sale signs on them in my neighborhood. I've seen a 1986 Chevrolet Cavalier sedan in grey that I can afford and a 1986 red(ish) Nissan Pulsar.

Now, I've never been very lucky with the ladies, and I'm hoping to snare one for a long-term relationship. My question is, what should I look for in a set of boss wheels? Something sporty, or something traditional to indicate that I am a dependable mate, at least until curfew?

Signed,
2 Wheels, 4 Eyes

Dear 2 Wheels, 4 Eyes,
You're on the right track with your lingo, son. Although kids of today would refer to a pimpin' ride or something similar, remember, to achieve the zen of creepy, you need to remain slightly asynchronous with your fellow man. Boss wheels works.

Dr. Creepy remembers the days of limited budgets, but only barely, since I'm a doctor now. However, I suggest an alternate to the vehicles you suggest. To really impress a woman, you need a grey cargo van.

I fondly remember the Ford Econoline I drove. It was a former business vehicle, with no windows and side-lettering painted over in a mismatched color of paint. When I drove that truck, I felt my masculinty coursing through me with every chunk-chunk-chunk of the bad bearings in the right front wheel. That sound drew attention, and the people were looking at me.

I customized some of the van myself; I put the "If the van's rockin'" bumper sticker on the rear bumper and replaced the passenger side mirror with the passenger side mirror from an old Ford Fairlane. I hitched the fuel tank up with a chain and a nut and bolt. Although I didn't have to do it with mine, I'd recommend spray painting the windows in the back of the van for privacy. Perhaps a couple of moving blankets for private time. That sort of initiative shows a woman that you're handy.

Yes, friend, you can take the Jaguars and you can take the Porsches of the world, but a woman takes note when you slow down in a grey cargo van to check her out. Who is that man, she wonders. Or the tingle of excitement a woman feels when she comes out of work at night and sees that van in the parking lot. Is he waiting for me? she asks herself, and her breathing quickens.

Would any mere BMW do that for a woman? I think not.

Plus, you can haul your G.I. Joe collection, weight bench, and bed when your mom throws you out.

Sincerely,
Dr. Creepy
- posted by Brian J. @ 9:25 PM   0 comments

 
It Could Be Nothing
Up to 14 hurt in SF hit-and-run spree:

As many as 14 people were injured this afternoon by a motorist who drove around San Francisco running them down before he was arrested, authorities said.

But it could be something:

Authorities have identified the man who was arrested as Omeed Aziz Popal, who has addresses in Ceres (Stanislaus County) and Fremont.

I'm certainly sensitive to the possibility.


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:57 PM   2 comments

 
On the Bright Side
Hey, it looks as though the Packers are improving on their open field tackles.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:56 PM   0 comments

 
Book Report: The Golden Gate by Alistair MacLean (1976)
I bought this book for a quarter at the Bridgeton Trails Branch of the St. Louis County library. Because, I guess, I'm frugal and wanted to save the seventy-five cents extra it would have cost me for a non-former library copy of this book at a book fair somewhere. No, more likely, I saw it and knew that I didn't have it, and I wanted it now, which was then.

As you know, I'm revisiting my Alistair MacLean fixation from high school (I read Partisans, Caravan to Vaccares, and Floodgate last year, as you remember, gentle reader).

Like Floodgate, this book ventures from MacLean's strongest topic matter, World War II and early Cold War espionage. In this book, a band of criminals hijack the motorcade of the President and a couple oil sheiks as it crosses the Golden Gate Bridge. There, the criminals hold the hostages for ransom, but they have to deal with an FBI agent in their midst.

The book is written in the typical MacLean potboiler fashion, with characters reminiscient of others in his line. The plot is novel and preposterous, but one expects some of that from MacLean. Some of the scenes and technical descriptions within the book--more the depictions of technical details--let us know that the author has carefully considered and choreographed what he's talking about, but the prose doesn't bring it to life. Fortunately, as with Clancy, one kind of skims these to get to the action.

So the book is an acceptable piece of the genre work, but more importantly, it solves a discussing I had with a (foreign national) co-worker (who left Oklahoma City in late 1995) about how easy it would be to damage the Golden Gate bridge in a terrorist attack. I was right that an attack on the road surface or the towers themselves would probably be ineffectual, but we didn't consider the effectiveness of attacking the suspension cables themselves. Probably because we're not engineers, we're not committed terrorists, and we were only killing time with spurious talk while watching the smokers gather on the sidewalk outside the entrance to the building across the street.

Never the less, this anecdote should at least illustrate the depth and the breadth of the Noggle Library. Odds are, I probably have a book about it, no matter what it is.

Books mentioned in this review:

     
- posted by Brian J. @ 11:08 PM   0 comments

 
I Do Not Think That Word Means What You Think It Means
Escort squires celebrity authors, finds them down-to-earth


- posted by Brian J. @ 2:36 PM   0 comments

 
L'il Dig?
A large public works project that goes hundreds of millions over budget, leads to suits and counter suits between the city and the contractors, and leads to an unsustainable business model that's freshly-mewling for more tax money. What could make it better? Oh, yeah, brag about the tunnels:

Instead of burrowing underground like miners, crews ripped open Forest Park Parkway and dug a trench that in some places is 45 feet deep. Reinforced concrete shored up the tunnel walls, and massive precast concrete tops - some weighing up to 30 tons - covered the tunnel.

Oh, boy.

I suspect this one, as only a minor boondoggle, won't collapse, but if it does, we can easily point our fingers at nearby home owners who will have cost lives to maintain their property values.

Also, the ACLU, somehow.


- posted by Brian J. @ 2:07 PM   6 comments

 
Number Four, With a Bullet (I Hope)
MfBJN: The #4 source on the Internet for worst kind of popular tripe.

But we're improving every day in our quest to be your best source for the worst kind of popular tripe.


- posted by Brian J. @ 10:08 PM   0 comments

 
ACLU Wants Little Girls To Die
Boy Scouts rescue toddler in river:

A troop of Boy Scouts on a camping trip saved an 18-month-old girl who had fallen in a river upstream from them and was floating face down, officials said.

James Taranto of Best of the Web Today reminds us:

The ACLU describes the Boy Scouts as "an organization that will go the way of the Daughters of the American Revolution in losing its place in American life if it does not end its discriminatory practices."

If the ACLU had its way, the intolerant organization wouldn't exist, and that little girl would be dead.

I suppose some secularists and nontraditionalists would say that something would arise to take the Boy Scouts place and to teach young men to love and respect themselves and nature and embraces homosexuality, but I'm not so optimistic. One thing's for sure, though; the Boy Scouts were prepared when they needed to be in this instance (and, no doubt, in many others). Fortunately for the little girl, her family, and for the future people she'll touch in her wonderful life.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:39 PM   1 comments

 
Chris Lawrence Said It (II)
He wrote:

Today’s Post-Dispatch has almost all the information you need to know about the grand opening of Metrolink’s Cross-County Extension next Saturday.

It probably didn't cover this, either:

A woman was critically injured when she apparently jumped into the path of a MetroLink train early today near the campus of the University of Missouri-St. Louis.

Wow, the enemies of light rail are going all out to sabotage the triumph of this inflexible marvel of modern transit just as its latest, and only second, rail line opens, only a year late and only hundreds of million over budget!


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:16 PM   0 comments

 
Chris Lawrence Said It
He wrote:

Today’s Post-Dispatch has almost all the information you need to know about the grand opening of Metrolink’s Cross-County Extension next Saturday.

It probably didn't cover this:

Several passengers suffered minor injuries when equipment on a MetroLink train got tangled and smashed into a window near Forest Park in St. Louis Monday evening.

Remember, friends, you can enjoy this sort of fun on the Shrewsbury-Clayton line starting this weekend!


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:59 PM   1 comments

 
Wherein I Admit That My Offspring Is A Genius
That is correct, my Post Fetal Creature (PFC) is a freakin' genius. He's only six weeks old and he's already talking. Well, he's said his first word, anyway. That is correct, at only six weeks old, my heir said, quite clearly, "a."

What, you noun-and-verb fetishists, an indefinite article isn't good enough for a first word? No, you want "mommy" or "dada" or "absquatulate" before you'll consider it a word.

You're just jealous of my child's obvious gifts.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:54 PM   3 comments

 
Unspoken Letters
Cardinals ticket sales are down, and they've got a million theories why, but none of the ones enumerated in the story match my expectation.

Here are two things that have alienated some of the out-of-town fan base:

• A publicly funded stadium. Remember the signs that said "We'll build a stadium when the Cardinals build highways"? The people who put them in their yards and on their farms do.
  
  
• The Cardinals bought KTRS and moved their broadcasts to the underpowered AM station and a "network" that leaves the radio coverage spotty in St. Louis, much less within driving range of a weekend in St. Louis.

No, certainly the dive in tourism traffic comes from gas prices and the rumor that every game is a sell-out. Good luck with continuing delusions.


- posted by Brian J. @ 10:15 PM   1 comments

 
Northrop Grumman Marketing Material Front Page News in St. Louis Post-Dispatch
We've known it for a long time, but why is the St. Louis Post-Dispatch now running as its Sunday headline, page one, above the fold, Missiles may be next big threat to U.S. airliners?

The nation's airline industry is a shoulder-launched missile attack away from plunging into a financial tailspin, one that could trigger $1 trillion-plus in financial losses in this country.

Five years after the devastating attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, U.S. passenger jets still have no response to a shoulder-launched missile that can be purchased on the black market for as little as $5,000 and can hit a target more than a mile away. If beefed-up airline security continues to keep terrorists and their bombs off commercial flights, shoulder-launched missile attacks pose a likely alternative, experts say.

"Terrorists are a lot like electricity: They take the path of least resistance," said Jack Pledger, an executive at defense contractor Northrop Grumman Corp. "Instead of working out elaborate methods, terrorists go to the next-easiest thing. If you take out these easy things, you drive them to using" a shoulder-launched missile.

Pledger is director of business development for Northrop Grumman's infrared-countermeasure program, which is testing a system that disrupts a shoulder-launched missile's guidance system. The cost of the system would be less than $1 million for each plane if Northrop were to receive enough orders to warrant high-rate production.

Such a deal! But the government and the airlines are not willing to choke up the million dollars' plus that Northrop Grumman charges for the solution. Ergo, it's time to gin up some outrage so The People force the airlines, hardly awash in slush funds, or the government, too awash in taxpayer slush, to bolster its bottom line.


- posted by Brian J. @ 12:29 PM   2 comments

 
Book Report: Barrier Island by John D. MacDonald (1986)
This book provides an interesting amalgamation of some of MacDonald's earlier work, the business-oriented novels, with some of the maudlin sentimentality found in the Travis McGee novels. As it was released as a heavy hardback, with nice paper, it aims to weightiness instead of brisk paperback sensibility. Unfortunately, it's unsatisfying.

The story opens on Tucker Loomis after a night with an old flame. He's brought her out to a romantic rendezvous off of Barrier Island, a, well, barrier island off of Mississippi or Florida. He not only wanted to rekindle a little good lovin', but he wanted his flame, a real estate agent, to witness a payoff to an assistant federal prosecutor. In case the fed fails to carry out his part of the deal, you see.

The book then explores several of the players as the land scheme for which ol' Tuck is being prosecuted unravels. An idealistic partner in a real estate firm tries to hold his marriage together while investigating the scheme. It seems that Tuck bought the land, envisioned a tropical paradise for millionaires, and sold its lots before the federal government condemned it and seized it for park land. Loomis wants a big settlement based upon the big profits he would have realized, but the idealist real estate man discovers some of the land sales Tuck had made were fraudulent. In addition to his marriage, the partner has to worry about maintaining his real estate firm with the wheeler-dealer who got involved with Tuck in the first place. Meanwhile, Tuck's dealing with a wife in a vegatative state and an attractive nurse who imagines herself as the new Mrs. Loomis--after the current Mrs. Loomis dies.

With this set of characters and framework, perhaps MacDonald could have done better. Unfortunately, the book suffers from two flaws:

• The point of view is skewed. We're introduced to Tucker Loomis in the beginning, so I wanted to root for him. However, he's not the protagonist. He's sort of the antagonist. The protagonist, as I can tell, is the idealistic real estate agent. Unfortunately, his voice isn't very consistent throughout the book. When we get the maudlin asides about the pillaging of the environment by the newcomers to the Gulf Coast, it's almost expository. It's acceptable in the McGee novels because it's a part of the character of Travis McGee; but here, it's hanging out there on its own.
  
  
• The end is abrupt. Tucker Loomis is laid low pretty quickly, and the masterful subplots and characterizations end up wasted.

I think the book mixes, unsuccessfully, elements of his early work, elements of the Travis McGee novels, and elements of his later, longer, hardback work (such as Condominium and One More Sunday). As one of his last works, if not the last, it's not a capstone of his career. But my copy is a first edition, nyah nyah.

Books mentioned in this review:


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:31 PM   0 comments

 
Almost A Punchline
Man falls into vat of chocolate, lives:

An ordinary night's work at the chocolate company turned dangerous for Darmin Garcia early Friday after he fell into a vat of the molten goo and was trapped for more than two hours.

"I was pushing the chocolate down into the vat because it was stuck," said Garcia, 21. "It came loose, and I just slid down the hopper into the chocolate."

With a picture that shows a dark-haired, bare-chested, 21-year-old muscular man more than waist deep in chocolate. Did I say Almost a punchline? I mean Every woman's fantasy.


- posted by Brian J. @ 10:54 PM   1 comments

 
Leave No Hamster Behind Act
Measure could force pet shops to keep better records; Bill also calls for stricter rules on exercise and care:

Lawmakers will vote today on a bill that could require pet shops to abide by stricter regulations like keeping detailed records on the animals they sell and providing toys and exercise wheels for small animals like rats, hamsters, mice and guinea pigs.

Face it, citizens, our civilization has peaked. The amount of civil liberties that citizens enjoy has reached its high water mark and is ebbing. Our government is now taking rights from us and giving them to animals.

Say what you will about the totalitarian nature of the Chinese regime, but at least it's using its totalitarianism to the ends of a human society and not the gerbil society.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:01 PM   2 comments

 
Real Men of Criminal Genius
The St. Louis Post-Dispatch lowers the bar on criminal masterminds in this story:

A cigarette thief is taking great pains not to get caught as he makes his getaway from Madison County stores, authorities said Tuesday.

Those great pains?

He uses duct tape to cover the registration number on the temporary Illinois tag on the back of his black Saturn, which has no front plate.

Because apparently the great pains don't include obscuring his face, since there's a full facial shot of him accompanying the story.


- posted by Brian J. @ 10:11 PM   1 comments

 
St. Louis Public Schools: Past Farce
I felt a great disturbance in the language, as if millions of grammarians suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

I don't know what's worse: that the St. Louis City public schools have to advertise so heavily to remind their apathetic student body to please, return at least the first couple of days so we can count you as enrolled when it comes time to get the state and federal funding.

No, what's worse is that the city schools in St. Louis have officially elevated 2 to preposition status. I mean, for cryssake, if the schools are going to write like that, how do they expect their students to do better?

Maybe they just don't.

Good luck continuing to pretend to be a viable, meaningful institution. See also reason #8922 why Brian never considered moving to the city when looking for a new home.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:55 PM   0 comments

 
Psycho Hitchhikers Go Berserk

Hitchhiker: You heard of this thing, the 8-Minute Abs?
Ted: Yeah, sure, 8-Minute Abs. Yeah, the excercise video.
Hitchhiker: Yeah, this is going to blow that right out of the water. Listen to this: 7... Minute... Abs.
Ted: Right. Yes. OK, all right. I see where you're going.
Hitchhiker: Think about it. You walk into a video store, you see 8-Minute Abs sittin' there, there's 7-Minute Abs right beside it. Which one are you gonna pick, man?
Ted: I would go for the 7.
Hitchhiker: Bingo, man, bingo. 7-Minute Abs. And we guarantee just as good a workout as the 8-minute folk.
Ted: You guarantee it? That's - how do you do that?
Hitchhiker: If you're not happy with the first 7 minutes, we're gonna send you the extra minute free. You see? That's it. That's our motto. That's where we're comin' from. That's from "A" to "B".
Ted: That's right. That's - that's good. That's good. Unless, of course, somebody comes up with 6-Minute Abs. Then you're in trouble, huh?
[Hitchhiker convulses]
Hitchhiker: No! No, no, not 6! I said 7. Nobody's comin' up with 6. Who works out in 6 minutes? You won't even get your heart goin, not even a mouse on a wheel.
Ted: That - good point.
Hitchhiker: 7's the key number here. Think about it. 7-Elevens. 7 doors. 7, man, that's the number. 7 chipmunks twirlin' on a branch, eatin' lots of sunflowers on my uncle's ranch. You know that old children's tale from the sea. It's like you're dreamin' about Gorgonzola cheese when it's clearly Brie time, baby.

Well, it's close.


- posted by Brian J. @ 5:50 PM   3 comments

 
Earnesty, If Not Honesty
The funniest part of this Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee ad? That they expect someone to believe that they'd be more hawkish and more law-and-orderly than the Republicans.

Man, it's probably the funniest thing running on YouTube right now.


- posted by Brian J. @ 5:47 PM   0 comments

 
Book Report: How to Break Software Security by James A. Whittaker and Herbert H. Thompson (2003)
After I read How to Break Software (which a quick Google check indicates I have not reviewed, gentle reader, but most of you wouldn't have read it anyway), I bought the companion volumes. This book, which I bought off of Amazon.com at its retail price, disappointed me where How to Break Software did not.

Both books run off of a quick list of fault-model testing (a term I learned from the first book). I had a ball with the first book, laughing at seeing some of my favorite dirty tricks encapsulated in someone definitive's book. This book, however, didn't hold the same glee for me.

The first book dealt with a broad subject and offered some very concrete things to try to attack software. This second book deals with a similarly broad subject (security testing), but is more abstract. The attacks it discusses aren't as narrow and easy to recreate; they're more methods and abstract ideas to try rather than concrete shortcuts to finding issues. I know, there's something to be said for a broad, ranging methodology, but the first book wasn't that way, and I didn't expect this one to be that way. Additionally, the book is sized similarly to the first, which doesn't allow it to go into a lot of detail for each of the abstract things it talks about.

Finally, I don't know that the book focuses enough on actual security attacks; rather, it focuses on attacks that could be construed as security breaches. However, in many cases, they're not specifically security attacks, but rather regular tests that could, if applied to applications needing security, be security attacks.

Maybe that's all security testing is, but this book wasn't different enough from the first book to make me wonder if it wasn't really a sequel given a better title.

On the other hand, it does come with a CD and a tool which looks to be pretty cool, if I could get some professional time to play with it.

So buy the first book, How to Break Software, and apply its attacks to secure software. Buy this book if you're really into it or if the company is buying it for you.

Books mentioned in this review:

 
- posted by Brian J. @ 10:41 PM   0 comments

 
I Cannot Be The Only One
I mean, who hasn't seen the stray drops fall from the nipple as you try to align the bottle with the mouth of a squalling, squirming baby, striking his or her cheeks, chin, and lips....who hasn't seen that and thought of tracer rounds?
- posted by Brian J. @ 6:48 PM   0 comments

 
Dominique Lurks
When you look into the bookshelves, the bookshelves look into you. Sometimes.




- posted by Brian J. @ 2:36 PM   3 comments

 
Book Report: RPG World Volume One by Ian Jones-Quartey (2004)
I am pretty sure I bought this book as part of a bag of books at the Webster Groves Book Fair. It doesn't matter, really, but I know you really dote upon my books' lineage, gentle reader, and I try to recreate it as accurately as I can for you.

The book collects a number of strips from an online comic, RPG World, and presents them, get this, in a hardback book. A graphic novel, if you will, from an online comic. How about that? Of course, I don't really follow online comics much; I mean, I see the Cox and Forkum and Day by Day like any good conservative blog reader who, you know, reads blogs that have the strips or cartoons printed on them, but I don't see the sites out. Heck, I don't even follow Calico Monkey, even though it's flashed by an acquaintance into whose debt I remain for setting me up with my current sweet gig.

But put it in a book? I am all on it!

The story follows the action of the characters in a video game for the PlayStation as they go about their quest and side quests and deal with the mechanics of the game. It's an amusing conceit and is full of jokes available to those familiar with the genre. I liked the book and liked that it took me only a couple of hours to read it. Unfortunately, just because I read it doesn't mean I'll follow the online version of the comic. Because I'm a luddite enough that I have certain things I don't tend to do, and follow comics online is one of them. But if I find another book of RPG World somewhere in the wild, I'll pick it up.

Books mentioned in this review:


- posted by Brian J. @ 5:45 AM   0 comments

 
Simple Answers for Stupid Questions
To tuck or not to tuck that is the question

“Most men want to wear the accepted norm, and for years that used to be khaki pants, a tucked blue shirt and black belt,” explains Gregg Andrews, a fashion director at Nordstrom.

Now, he says the uniform is premium jeans and a striped button-down shirt that is untucked.

Not in my world, mister. Do some sit-ups, by a real holster for your concealed carry needs, and tuck it in.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:54 PM   0 comments

 
Wherein Brian J. Strikes "Never" From His Libertarian Dictionary
Mehlville agency will seek lower tax rate:

The Mehlville Fire Protection District will propose yet another reduction in its property tax rate at next week's tax rate hearing.

The Board of Directors will propose a tax rate of 69.8 cents per $100 assessed valuation for 2007, Chairman Aaron Hilmer said.

"The reason we lowered it even further than we originally intended was (that) as we looked at the amount of reserves that we had, they were just stunning . . . what we built up in the last 18 months," Hilmer said. "This is in addition to building a new firehouse, buying a new fire truck, ordering another one, getting three new ambulances, new staff cars, upgrading medical, etcetera. So we looked and saw we were projecting eight to nine million dollars in reserves, in addition to new taxes we're bringing in, and that's why we decided to lower it even more."

I'm writing in the name Aaron Hilmer for 3rd District Congressional Representative this year.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:51 PM   0 comments

 
Ask Dr. Creepy: Movie Stars As Inspiration
Dear Doctor Creepy,
I'm trying to find creepy actors whose mannerisms--and creepy characters--I can use as inspiration for emulation in every day life. I like Edward Norton and really like Crispin Glover, especially for his role in Williard. If I choose one to imitate for maximum creepiness, who should it be?

Signed,
Creeping 2 Creepy

Dear Creeping to Creepy,
For starters, you poser, do not use numbers for words; there is nothing creepy about Prince-hop.

Secondly, you've presented Dr. Creepy with a false dilemma in choosing between Norton and Glover. Both have their finer points as creepy character actors, but ultimately their other work will overshadow their best roles.

And although some might suspect that I favor Ronald Lacey, whereas I do hold the immortal Toht close to heart at all times, if I could have all junior weirdos out their emulate one frightening modern character actor, I would recommend David Patrick Kelly. The short, high-pitched actor commands attention and makes skin crawl in any motion picture in which he appears, from his role as Doyle in Last Man Standing to T-Bird in The Crow. Certainly, although Sam the Sleazeball appeared to reform in The Adventures of Ford Fairlane, did you really believe that the flower-toting, woman-defending fisticuffs were genuine and bound to last? I couldn't. And his pièce de résistance remains the too-brief role of Sully in Commando.

Working his nonhandsomeness together with his diminutive height and high pitched voice (which sounds lispy, even when it's not), Kelley combines pathetic with the fear that violence might erupt at any moment. My friends, that's the essence of creepy, and no one has it like David Patrick Kelley.

Sincerely,
Dr. Creepy


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:16 PM   0 comments

 
I'll See Your Conspiracy Theory And Raise You
George W. Bush has ginned up the fake "air terror" alert to make it inconvenient for you to fly. So you'll have to drive to your destinations and will have to buy gas at Big Oil's gouge--nay, plunge router!--prices.

You silly fools who think it's all about influencing an election... you've forgotten It's All About Oiiiil!
- posted by Brian J. @ 8:25 PM   1 comments

 
Said The Fat City Lawyer Cat
Hard to think how this could be taken pejoratively:

"This is a bunch of good kids from Fulton," said Weiser's lawyer, Carter Collins Law. "As far as I can tell, they're a bunch of little country mice. And I don't mean that in a ... pejorative way at all," she said.

From what children's story book did this condescending attorney pluck did this particular bunch? The Little Country Mice Who Chewed Through MoneyGram International's Wires Accidentally And Got a Lot of Cheese Nationwide?

I don't know if I ever want an attorney defending me to try the Forrest Gump defense. I mean, who does this attorney think is more naive, her clients or anyone listening?


- posted by Brian J. @ 4:32 PM   0 comments

 
To The Winners Go The Spoiling
Voters approve increasing license fees for businesses:

St. Louis voters approved an increase to the business license fee, dealing a victory to Mayor Francis Slay's assault on crime.

And a victory to Francis Slay's assault on companies located in the city limits.

How is this a victory in the assault on crime? Is Francis Slay's opponents in this war on crime businesses? Giving the questionable government of the city of St. Louis more money to squander as it sees fit (and more money in the general fund for slush like sports commissions) doesn't directly impact crime. But if the "assault on crime" is all about raising money, I guess I stand corrected and it is a victory.


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:49 PM   0 comments

 
9th District Court of Appeals Defends Property Rights
Federal appeals court rules against workplace PC privacy:

If you think the Web sites you access on your workplace computer are nobody else's business, think again.

That was the message today from the Ninth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in San Francisco, which upheld a Montana man's conviction for receiving obscene material that his employer found on his computer during a late-night raid.

"Social norms suggest that employees are not entitled to privacy in the use of workplace computers, which belong to their employers and pose significant dangers in terms of diminished productivity and even employer liability," said Judge Diarmuid O'Scannlain in the 3-0 ruling.

He said other courts have consistently ruled that employers are entitled to monitor their workers' use of computers as long as they had disclosed that policy to their workforce.

Unlike some respected legal minds, I don't think this is a defeat for privacy rights; instead, it's a victory for property rights. Because even though some people would phrase it this way:

If you think the Web sites you access on your workplace computer are nobody else's business, think again.

Because let's not forget, it's not your computer, it's your employer's. It's not your Internet connection at work, it's your employers. And anyone who would give you rights over that property which you don't own takes rights away from the actual owner.

Apparently, this runs counter to established case law regarding searches and seizures and where arbitrary edges of the invented right to privacy lies. Friends, this strikes me, like much law does, as to arguing what sort of pin angels can dance upon. From the distant, forest sort of view, it doesn't matter whether the gumdrop trees are green or blue because it's still a candy forest in a child's imagination. But I haven't finished law school.

I suspect that throwing computers into the story has triggered automatic responses from the digitally-inclined libertarians amongst us. After all, information wants to be free, unless it wants to hide in the shadows of privacy's billowing petticoats. Because it's computers, it's different and twenty-first century.

But it looks to me, simply, that once you've established that the employee has certain rights to use the employer's facilities and materiel as the employee wants, we cannot stop easily at the compter namespace. No, the employee then should have certain privacy rights to be free from monitoring, from both the employer and the government, in other facilities or with other employer-provided mechanisms for communicating and productivity.

Conference rooms become cones of silence, in which you can conduct personal business without fear of eviction for actual meetings. Why not plan your family reunion? Letterhead and printed envelopes become diplomatic pouches, wherein you should expect everything you write, type, or print upon them to be private, for the addressee only. Don't forget the 900 numbers on your phone system. The Man blocking them surely infringes upon your privacy and its emanated right to a psychic reading.

No, the 9th District here accidentally protected the rights of property holders from those who would virtually squat upon those items. Regardless of search, seizure, or illegal activity, the computers belong to the employers, and the employees have no right to their network connections, memory, or hard disk space for personal use.


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:07 PM   0 comments

 
A Metaphor I Could Have Lived Without
Bryan Burwell of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch writes of Floyd Landis:

His lies are so bad that they remind me of my dearly departed grandmother who used to blame her flatulence on our aging cocker spaniel, even though the foul aroma was wafting directly from her flowery frock.

So the Liar King Landis tries to ignore the foul smell of guilt wafting all around him and blame it on everybody and everything but my lovable dead dog.

Burwell is purportedly a professional writer. Can we just nominate him for the Pulitzer, nay, the Nobel Prize for Literature! right now?


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:23 PM   0 comments

 
Milwaukee Admirals Celebrate Halloween Every Day
The Milwaukee Admirals have a new look and a new logo, and it's goofy:

In conjunction with its new slogan "Never say die," which has been teasing local billboard readers for the past month, the Admirals introduced the new logo: the admiral of a ghost ship. A pirate explained to the crowd that the admiral had been at the bottom of Lake Michigan for the past 20 years and that this was what was left of him.

The new logo is quite a bit edgier than the last logo of the salty seaman admiral. The new admiral, designed by Joe Locher of Yes Men of Milwaukee, is a skull with a black admiral's cap with ice blue trim.

The team's new colors will be black, ice blue and silver, replacing the old red, white and blue. "We wanted to do something that would be really popular with the younger crowd," Locher said. "We wanted to avoid the idea of a trendy logo, yet we wanted to tie it in to the heritage of the team to have it make more sense."

Yeah, a skeleton logo in black, white, and ice blue. That'll impress the kids these days. What, did they think they weren't selling enough merchandise to the gangbanger crowd that flocks to Raiders apparel?

Plus, let's just savor that insight from the marketing man again:

"We wanted to do something that would be really popular with the younger crowd," Locher said. "We wanted to avoid the idea of a trendy logo, yet we wanted to tie it in to the heritage of the team to have it make more sense."

Avoiding a trendy logo yet tying it into the heritage of the team.

Obviously, this fellow's skill lies with imagery, and not expressing cohesive concepts in language.

(Link seen a while back on The American Mind.)


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:52 PM   0 comments

 
Is It That Time Already?
In April, I sent a letter cancelling my subscription to Reader's Digest's The World's Best Reading series of classic literature editions.

It must be the beginning of the month, because I've got another invoice for a book whose shipment I refused. I'll have to drop another letter in the mail saying I won't pay this invoice, either, since I freaking cancelled five months ago.

Reader's Digest Association: It's Like AOL from the Ninteenth Century.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:16 PM   0 comments

 
That One Kid Must Be a Fish
Illinois to track liquor sales to minor

In other news, the remainder of Illinois' under-21 population has breathed a sigh of relief that the Man won't be watching them.


- posted by Brian J. @ 3:09 PM   0 comments

 
Sherman Parker Arrest Complete Statement
Sherman Parker or someone at his campaign has sent me the complete statement he issued after his recent arrest:

Below is the fulll text of a statement I sent to the Post Dispatch regarding the story that is in today's (Saturday) paper about my unfortunate incident this week: On Monday, July 31, 2006, after erecting campaign signs in St. Charles County, I was pulled over on Highway 40 and detained by a Missouri State Highway trooper. I was not initially stopped for a traffic violation or any violation of the law. I did not receive a ticket for this stop. After checking my driving record, the trooper later determined that a bench warrant had been issued for my arrest for missing a court date for a speeding violation in Chesterfield.

I had previously written the court a letter requesting to reschedule my court date since this date was during the legislative session. In the course of the ensuing weeks, with the session winding down and attempting to get my congressional campaign into full gear, I neglected to follow up with the court, and thus a bench warrant was issued without my knowledge. Prior to this incident, I had never been arrested by any law enforcement officer anywhere.

At the present time, all my fines have been paid, and I now want to put this embarrassing matter behind me. I apologize and I understand, that as an elected official, no one person is above the law. I must strive everyday to set a higher example. I very much regret that this incident may detract, in these last few days, from the issues I have been stressing in this campaign such as: improving healthcare, economic development, and the rising cost of energy.

As I'd hoped, it's straightforward and doesn't avoid blame for a procedural error leading to his bench warrant and doesn't go off on the cop who arrested him. No indignation, no racial overtones, just a statement about what happened.

On a side note, aren't bench warrants neat things? Personally, I wonder sometimes if there's a bench warrant out for me. I mean, a speed zone or red light camera ticket mailed to the wrong address, and suddenly I could be calling my wife to bail me out of jail. One wonders if this is a good mechanism for minor law enforcement, but then again, if one is like this one (me), one knows that it's not about law enforcement as getting revenue and asserting authority.


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:42 AM   2 comments

 
Book Report: The World's Most Infamous Crimes and Criminals (1987)
I'm not even sure any more where I bought this book. It clocks in at over 700 pages, friends, and it took me almost three weeks to read. As a matter of fact, I had to take a break in the middle of it to read I Ought To Be In Pictures when I was getting depressed from all the stories of murder and mayhem.

First off, I'd like to say that this collection is one of the most poorly edited and produced books I've come across in some time. A cheap edition published in Great Britain, this book features gritty paper, a cover that's close enough to a pizza box in quality to merit the comparison, pages cut by a dull blade, and partially washed out ink in many places. Additionally, the editing job was poor; many sidebar two-paragraph anecdotes inserted to break up sections actually retold the stories of incidents and crimes told elsewhere in the book. In the case of Black Bart, an old West stagecoach robber, he has his own named section in one chapter and, later in the chapter, is recounted as a part of a section about the most notorious Western robbers. By "is recounted," I mean the same seven or eight paragraphs appear twice in the same chapter, separated by only a handful of pages. This book definitely doesn't represent an academic or thoughtful work in any sense of the imagination. It's completely a case of slapping together a large number of pruriently-interesting things and hoping to make as much from them as possible.

Still, it contains quite the compendium of famous, infamous, and trivial crimes of murder, genocide, fraud, theivery, and whatnot. The first couple hundred pages focus on mass murderers and genocidal tyrants, which led to my distaste to which I alluded. It did, however, give me a little historical perspective on the "disproportionate" and violent doings of the Western military, particularly the American and Israeli militaries, in the last 100 years. I mean, come on, the Huns and the Khans and the Ottomans were capable of real genocide, not having small units go nuts or ordnance going errant. When we lose perspective on what animal mankind really is, I guess it's easy to think that our civilization isn't better than the worst man has to offer.

Is the book a worthwhile read? Well, if you're looking for macabre trivia--and who isn't? But take plenty of breaks to retain your perspective that all of mankind isn't like this book depicts.

Books mentioned in this review:


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:52 PM   0 comments

 
Driving While Black Republican
Akin rival arrested on traffic warrants:

On Monday night, Parker had just finished staking campaign signs on private property near Highway 40 in St. Charles County when he was pulled over by a state trooper who questioned what Parker was doing near the road.

When the officer later did a check on the candidate's drivers license, he discovered that Parker had two arrest warrants for unresolved traffic violations in St. Louis County. Parker was briefly taken into police custody and released after paying a pair of $100 bonds, according to court documents.

So this has all the trappings of a racial profiling sort of stop, and the Post-Dispatch's activism is muted. Because the target is a Republican, or because the target himself is avoiding the obvious?

Parker, already considered a long shot to unseat Akin, issued an apologetic statement after being asked about the arrest on Friday.

"I very much regret that this incident may detract, in these last few days, from the issues I have been stressing in this campaign," Parker said in a statement.

And:

"I understand, that as an elected official, no one person is above the law," Parker said.

Sounds like the reasoned response of someone we'd want to elect. I haven't seen the full statement (it's not on his Web site), but I hope it's as apologetic and appropriate as the paper makes it sound. Not accusatory, not avoiding responsibility, just explanatory and humble.

UPDATE: Representative Parker has sent me his complete statement, posted here.


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:52 AM   0 comments

 
Mmmm, Underbelly
Novelist emerges from cult status writing about underbelly of Ozarks:

A few hollows and half a universe south of Laura Ingalls Wilder's last little house, you'll find Daniel Woodrell.

In this author's world, Pa cooks meth and Ma sits by the potbelly with unwashed hair, her mind "broke." The three young ones pretty much fend for themselves.

There's no sunshiny morning or easy redemption in these Missouri hills. No tender stories of life's travails eased by kindly neighbors or a loving Savior.

Although Woodrell's characters share traditions with hardscrabble Ozark folks of lore, his stories probably aren't going to grab the "Little House on the Prairie" or "Shepherd of the Hills" crowd. Old Matt's moonshine still isn't so quaint when it's a lab for making crank.

Woodrell is Missouri's most original, yet underappreciated working author. He's not unknown: Ang Lee made a movie of one of his books, and others have been optioned.

Because the coastal cultural elites prefer that their inferiors in the interior be seemy, irredeemable, redneck trash. Congratulations to Woodrell for his success in perpetuating and profiting from the stereotypes.

In my experience, the people of that area are less crusty and shotgun eccentric and more earthy and friendly. But as the journalist writing the piece indicates, the underbelly sells more than the smiling face, helpful hands, or strong back.


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:46 AM   0 comments

 
Chicken Dreams
Tristan fantasizes about dinner:




- posted by Brian J. @ 3:06 AM   4 comments

 
Violate The Geneva Conventions At Home
It's not waterboarding as interrogation; it's yoga!

Be sure to click view the Windows Media Player video How to use a Neti Pot in the right sidebar, just in case they reinstate the draft and you're assigned to Guantanamo Bay.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:48 PM   0 comments

 
Motto
When in Rome, do as the Visigoths do.

UPDATE Oops. Oh, yeah, I completely, inadvertently, ripped off Mark Steyn. Now I feel like a real blogger, headed for scandal. And after I even sent it to Top Five's Ruminations, too.


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:30 AM   0 comments

 
Friday Morning Serenity
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Also, let me win the Powerball.


- posted by Brian J. @ 6:28 AM   3 comments

 
From Death to Lawsuit in 5 Days
Parents of woman killed in sky-diver plane crash file suit:

The parents of a would-be skydiver who died along with five others in a plane crash Saturday [July 29] filed a lawsuit today [August 2] claiming negligence caused the aircraft’s engine to fail.

Vivian and Susan Delacroix of Kent, England, brought suit against the engine manufacturer, skydiving club and others claiming they are responsible for the death of their daughter, Victoria Delacroix, 22.

"Our initial investigation points to a right engine failure just after takeoff," said Gary C. Robb, a Kansas City attorney representing the family.

Congratulations to the proud attorney who pursued the pursuit of justice to England and probably got the lawsuit file before the body was buried. Not only is he quick, but he's aggressive with the defendants:

The maker of the PT6A turbo prop engine in the DeHavilland DHC-6 airplane that crashed after taking off from the Sullivan Regional Airport. The manufacturer was Pratt & Whitney, which is owned by United Technologies.

Annick Laberge, a spokesman for Pratt & Whitney Canada division, declined comment today.

"It is our corporate policy not to discuss incidents under investigation," she said.

The suit also names the Quantum Leap Skydiving Center, which operated the skydiving club; the airport, which serviced and maintained the plane; Adventure Aviation, which owned the plane; and pilot Scott Cowan, who also perished in the crash.

Suing the estate of another victim of the crash. That, my friends, is pluck with a capital F.

Although we at MfBJN wonder how they couldn't work Thomas Miskel, Bourbeuse River Hauling, and Six Flags into the suit somehow. Perhaps it's only a matter of time.

(I post this with the plantiffs' attorney's name in here understanding that this attorney will find this post--hi there!-- next time he or a member of his staff uses Google to find his 'fan base,' but the last I heard, calling someone plucky is not actually libelous.)


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:18 PM   1 comments

 
I Hope That Wasn't the DEA Looking
Apparently, I'm the number 11 Google hit for how is the heroin getting into milwaukee.

I guess I'll get a little extra scrutiny now. Thanks, Google.


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:16 PM   0 comments

 
Ruining It For Everybody
Woman sues over son's drowning death during church outing:

The mother of one of the five children who drowned last month during a church outing to an eastern Missouri state park has sued the church and Joyce Meyer Ministries, claiming negligence and inadequate supervision.

The wrongful death lawsuit, filed Tuesday in St. Louis Circuit Court, also said the ministries and its St. Louis Dream Center church did not have parents' permission to take 50 children to Castlewood State Park in St. Louis County on July 9.

Litigation compounds a tragedy by ensuring that other depressed youth won't get the opportunity to go to church picnics in the future.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:44 PM   1 comments

 
What Would Papa Do?
The old man and the six-toed cats: Hemingway home in dispute:

The caretakers of Ernest Hemingway's Key West home want a federal judge to intervene in their dispute with the U.S. Department of Agriculture over the six-toed cats that roam the property.

More than 50 descendants of a multi-toed cat the novelist received as a gift in 1935 wander the grounds of the home, where Hemingway lived for more than 10 years and wrote "A Farewell to Arms" and "To Have and Have Not."

The Ernest Hemingway Home and Museum disputes the USDA's claim that it is an "exhibitor" of cats and needs to have a USDA Animal Welfare License, according to a complaint filed Monday in U.S. District Court in Miami.

"What they're comparing the Hemingway house to is a circus or a zoo because there are cats on the premises," Cara Higgins, the home's attorney, said Friday. "This is not a traveling circus. These cats have been on the premises forever."

He would have broken a walking stick over his head is what he would have done. Or shot himself, perhaps; our world does not accommodate men of Papa's stature and temperment any more. Instead, it allows attorneys and government functionaries to live the lives to which they've become accustomed, at our expense and at the expense of our mythology.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:41 PM   0 comments