Musings from Brian J. Noggle
Friday, November 05, 2004
 
Everyone Needs a Hobby

In this story, entitled "Rogue pilot ruffles feathers on migration", we discover that some people do their part to improve the world by flying planes to lead migrating cranes south for the winter.

And sometimes those crazy calhouns get upset:
    As a pilot, crane impersonator and chief executive officer of Operation Migration - the whooping crane migration organization - Duff's emotional well-being relies upon making sure his cranes are happy and healthy.

    So when a rogue ultralight pilot recently sneaked up behind his craft and cranes - as the whoopers were migrating south over Illinois' Lee and DeKalb counties - Duff's mood darkened.

    "For the most part, the ultralight community has been very respectful" about the crane project, he said. If they see Duff and his flying family coming, they get out of the way and land.

    But this time, an unidentified pilot decided to come in for a closer look.

    "I'd seen them ahead of me - maybe about a mile or so in front," he said. There were two crafts, he said. And they moved off to the side.

    Not long after that, he noticed that his birds were falling out of formation and trying to fly ahead of him.

    At first, this didn't ruffle him too much.

    The cranes see Duff and his plane as their parent. And, like any kid, they'll occasionally challenge their sire's authority. When young cranes do this during migration, they fly ahead.

    But this time, Duff said, the birds looked more frightened than sassy. That's when he realized something was wrong.

    He was being tailed.
Man, there's so much snark to be had that I only have time to offer a sample:
  • In its white papers, Operation Migration probably describes itself as the leading migration organization which delivers value in a rapid-flight market or something. The migration organization.

  • In addition to oppressing women, killing dissidents, and funding terror, most Middle East societies probably don't personally lead migratory birds to their winter (or wet season) habitats. Time to liberate some seedcrackers.

  • Dude's wife, if he's married, has probably resigned herself to marriage with an adulterer, whether that's the case or not. Come on, "Honey, I'm going to fly the birds to Texas this week"? She's probably even mad at him for not lying better.

  • The fellow, in addition to being the leading defender of cranes, is also the leading proponent of an annual season on ultralights.
Bah, that's enough for now.


- posted by Brian J. @ 1:21 PM   0 comments
 
Rolled a 1 on d6

For those of you who are paranoid enough to want a secret door but are trusting enough to buy one off the shelf, on your credit card, there's Hidden Doors.com.


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:46 AM   0 comments
Thursday, November 04, 2004
 
Blasting Bush? Blasting Us

Drudge proclaims that UK PAPERS TRASH BUSH and displays the cover of the Daily Mirror, which features a headline How can 59,054,087 people be so DUMB? (See it here.)

My friends, that's not a blast at Bush. That's a blast to those of us who voted for Bush, and indirectly a blast all of America.

Whether Americans who agree with the sentiment know it or not.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:48 AM   0 comments
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
 
Michael Moore, Depressed? Are You Kidding?

I've seen speculation on blogs this morning and heard it on the radio that Michael Moore must be depressed this morning. If you think so, you're crazy.

Michael Moore has achieved greater infamy and fiscal success in the last four years of his ranting and raving (mostly raving) about George W. Bush. A John Kerry presidency would have proved limiting for Michael Moore's "talents." Fortunately, Michael Moore can continue now with the "work" that has proven so lucrative for him.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:12 AM   0 comments
 
Will Darren Sharper Testify?

If the maelstrom of lawsuits comes, will Green Bay Packer safety Darren Sharper testify, as an expert for the defense, upon the theft of an election that was a guaranteed Kerry victory based on the unrelated and certainly non-causual occurrence regarding the Redskins' wins and losses preceding a presidential election?

If so, the Republicans should call Manny Ramirez to testify that 2004 is an outlier, wherein historical streaks come to an end.


- posted by Brian J. @ 9:04 AM   0 comments
Tuesday, November 02, 2004
 
How Cool Is That?

In an e-mail with a friend, I just referred to Israel as the Middle East's oldest democracy.

How cool is that? That would be a legacy for a president, ainna?


- posted by Brian J. @ 1:31 PM   0 comments
 
An Attack on Free Speech

I don't know which is worse, the headline "Dutch filmmaker accused of ridiculing Islam slain", with its passive voice implication that maybe he had it coming to him since he was, after all, accused of ridiculing Islam, or the first paragraph:
    A controversial Dutch filmmaker accused by Muslims of ridiculing their religion was stabbed and shot dead in Amsterdam on Tuesday, shocking the Netherlands where the killing was denounced as an attack on free speech.
Pardon my Midwestern simplicity here, but I think that a more basic right was violated somewhere along the line. But to some people, the metaphor's more important than the concrete, and the abstract more important than the specific, and you cannot suffer along with the oppressed dead guy if it's just murder--but if it's suppression of free speech, it's just like Bush's America!

(Link seen on Instapundit.)


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:44 AM   0 comments
 
The Funniest Thing on the St. Louis County Ballot

    Preposition A: Shall the St. Louis County Charter be amended so that any County assistance of value, whether direct or indirect, to development of a professional sports facility, requires prior to any assistance being given that the County Auditor first prepare a fiscal note and that the governing body proposing to take action to provide financial assistance hold a public hearing and that the financial assistance be approved by a majority of the qualified voters of the County voting thereon?
Jeez, in the last ten years, they've built or funded a new hockey/basketball arena, a football stadium, and a baseball stadium. This will pretty much eliminate a new professional dog racing track or perhaps an Olympic venue.

On the other hand, if this passes, it will be funny to see how the politicos in power deal with the trigger in the St. Louis Rams' current lease that they can leave if the Edward Jones Dome falls out of the top ten facilities in the nation. Undoubtedly, the County and the city will find money to refurbish professional sports arenas without a pesky hearing.


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:25 AM   0 comments
 
Michael Moore of Video Gaming

Spare us the enlightened citizens' re-education through First Person Shooters. From the Entertainment Weekly profile of the forthcoming Halo 2:
    Clearly, there are political and religious dimensions to Halo 2 that were absent from the first game. ("You could look at [the story] as a damning condemnation of the Bush administration's adventure in the Middle East," admits Staten.) Such provocative themes were bound to come under the scrutiny of Microsoft's legal team. Even as the game was getting its final polish, lawyers forced Staten to change the name of an alien antagonist, arguing that it carried Muslim overtones. Staten objected. Nonetheless, some of the voice actors (who include Michelle Rodriguez, Ron Perlman, and Miguel Ferrer) were called back to rerecord dialogue only weeks before the final version was delivered.
My knee jerk reaction is to condemn it out of hand, but hey, he's a storyteller, and he can tell the story he wants. We in the West allow people to express themselves and seek to better our own consciousnesses by understanding other cultures, even those completely at odds with our way of life.

Hey, that's well and good. Just so we don't forget that our culture affords tolerance and certain parts of ours does not, and our culture, though imperfect, is better than the peak of Islamicism and we defend it.

(Link seen on The Bleat, which is a daily column from some obscure Minnesotan newspaperman.)


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:15 AM   0 comments
 
In Order to Form a More Perfect Punned-It-Ocracy I

The friendly woman at the gym did really say that the friendly staph was there to serve us?


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:47 AM   0 comments
 
In Order to Form a More Perfect Punned-It-Ocracy II

I guess, then, as the opposite of disenfranchised voter, an enfranchised voter is a voter whose product, votes, is available in many different locations, such as several different polling places or states.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:42 AM   0 comments
Monday, November 01, 2004
 
McClellan Wants a Draft

In the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, Bill McClellan favors a draft for important reasons:
    The military used to be the Church of the Second Chance. If a youngster got in trouble, he was often given the choice - the military or jail.
I think that's the only actual reason why he favors a draft. The rest is a ramble.


- posted by Brian J. @ 5:16 PM   0 comments
 
Steinberg Didn't Say That, Did He?

It looks like Neil Steinberg said this:
    That isn't enough, however. Christianity never seems happy unless it is on the march, and why be satisfied practicing your faith when you can also try to impose it upon others?
Outrageous. Absolutely outrageous.


- posted by Brian J. @ 5:11 PM   0 comments
 
Your One Stop Paranoia Shop

Okay, so read this bit in Ann Althouse's Dick Cheney's Hawaiian visit:
    5) Another very pretty girl whom I could only conclude was a Secret Service groupie. She came in and as I gave her a lei she held up her Bush Cheney sign and asked where she could get autographs from Secret Service guys. I pointed them out to her but told her I didn't know if she'd have any luck. I saw her after the event and she had managed to get several!
So here's the question from your shidoshi of paranoia:
    What can someone forge with a Secret Service agent's signature?

- posted by Brian J. @ 4:04 PM   0 comments
 
And Next....

Note to Pediatrics: Instead of banning BB guns and paintball guns because FOUR CHILDREN A YEAR or fewer die from them, how about we focus first on the more dangerous schnucking STAIRCASES and BATHTUBS, which kill far more?

Because they don't look like EEEEEEEEVIL GUNS? Okay, then, as long as we understand the real goal here.

Coming soon in this month's Musings magazine: a study about how deadly raging academic stupidity is. Never mind the study or the methodology, the press release announcing the study is the important thing.


- posted by Brian J. @ 1:38 PM   0 comments
 
Book Review: MENSA Think-Smart Book by Dr. Abbie F. Salny & Leris Burke Frumkes (1986)

I picked this book at a yard sale some years ago and have just gotten around to it now. It's a thin book, 124 pages, broken into chapters that provide different puzzles/means of cognition and intelligent ways to approach them. Memorization tips, visual skills, and whatnot.

It's an interesting little book, with nice little tricks. However, it's not going to put me over the cusp into the warm embrace of Mensa, mostly because the book doesn't cure lazy. But if you're motivated to improve your thought, it's a quick enough read.


- posted by Brian J. @ 11:40 AM   0 comments
 
Interesting Occurrence

As some of you know, I was home in Milwaukee this weekend. As some of you in Wisconsin know, John Kerry and George Bush are holding simultaneous rallies in downtown Milwaukee (please don't anything blow up).

I knew about the Kerry rally the minute I walked down Wisconsin because I was accosted by Kerry volunteers on every corner who wanted my attendance.

On the other hand, I wouldn't have known about the Bush rally if I hadn't seen it on the news.

I hope this smacks of a certain amount of desperation to get bodies--that Bush has already filled up the convention center and that Kerry needs street people to fill the plaza outside the Starbucks. But who knows? One sees what one wants to see.


- posted by Brian J. @ 8:08 AM   0 comments
 
Channelling Pejman

I feel so Pejmanic posting this love poem, but he started it with all the poems he's posting these days. So here's on with which I became reacquainted this weekend:

Cruise
by David Gilmour

Cruise you are making me sing
Now you have taken me under your wing
Cruise, we both know you're the best
How can they say you're like all the rest

Cruise, we're both travelling so far
Burning out fast like a shooting star
Cruise I feel sure that your song will be sung
And will ring in the ears of everyone

Saving our children, saving our land
Protecting us from things we can't understand
Power and Glory, Justice and Right
I'm sure that you'll help us to see the light
And the love that you radiate will keep us warm
And help us to weather the storm

Cruise, you have taken me in
And just when I've got you under my skin
You start ignoring the fears I have felt
'Cause you know you can always make my poor heart melt

Please don't take what I'm saying amiss
Or misunderstand at a time such as this
Because if such close friends should ever fall out
What would there be left worth fighting about

Power and glory, justice and right
I'm sure that you'll help them to see the light
Will you save our children, will you save our land
And protect us from all the things we can't understand?
Power and glory and justice for all
Who will we turn to when your hard rain falls

(Lyric source.) It's from his album About Face, and somehow I think this 1984esque song probably meant it as satire.

I, on the other hand, remember the feelings I had when I sat in a stadium in southwest Missouri and an A10 flew over. An ugly machine crafted only to rain fire and death. Even though I knew this, I was happy that our technology is better than theirs. All of them others theirs.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:52 AM   0 comments
 
The Deity Speaks?

It's rumored at Powerline that Brett Favre has spoken:

    UPDATE: Hah! It's true what they say about Karl Rove. Dusty Tryggestad writes:
      Actually, my mom recieved a recorded message from Brett Favre supporting Bush. Reference was made to today's win vs the Redskins. I would imagine this is playing all over Wisconsin.
    I think this could make the difference in Wisconsin. I mean, really.
St. Louisians, this is not the equivalent of an Ozzie Smith endorsement; this is Jack Buck and Kurt Warner (2000) telling you to vote for a candidate.

If true.


- posted by Brian J. @ 7:38 AM   0 comments
To say Noggle, one first must be able to say the "Nah."